19:43:53: Package picked up by Jeff Colen
19:43:54: @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) does not normally mourn death.  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) is accustomed to the loss of those they meet, in one capacity or another.  But that last death.  A split second of @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) thinking about it meant they were a split second too late on the trigger as @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen) emerged from the parking garage, package in tow.  The shot missed.  @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen) dove, taking a shot mid-air.  @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen) was not thinking about human connection, unlike @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco).  This is arguably why @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) was shot in the gut.  @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen) resumes their delivery, package in tow.
19:49:49: @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen) took a shortcut due to a fake sign placed by @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine), tripping over a portable road spike, and then landing in a field of Guruvian Nesters, an exotic species known for their sexual appetite.  @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) currently has the package.
19:51:11: @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) leaps off of a second story building on to a tall dumpster, shortening the fall.  Unfortunately this dumpster is full of explosives placed by @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen).  @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen) smiles as they plunge their thumb onto the detonator switch, their face ignited by a pillar of flames as @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) is incinerated.  @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen) throws the detonator over their shoulder as they pick up the package that rolls to their feet as if it was meant for them.  @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen) breaks into a fast run, taking the stolen package with them.  "Parcel transferred," emits from their delivery bracelet signifying even more credits to be earned.  "Parcel transferred, indeed," @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen) whispers in reply.
20:00:31: @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) does not normally mourn death.  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) is accustomed to the loss of those they meet, in one capacity or another.  But that last death.  A split second of @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) thinking about it meant they were a split second too late on the trigger as @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen) emerged from the parking garage, package in tow.  The shot missed.  @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen) dove, taking a shot mid-air.  @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen) was not thinking about human connection, unlike @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco).  This is arguably why @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) was shot in the gut.  @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen) resumes their delivery, package in tow.
20:38:40: @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) tried to sneak on board @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen)'s ship but a security robot detected and repelled the attempt.  @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen) continues their delivery.
20:38:46: The delivery point only has one way in, about a hundred yards away from a gated entry.  @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) has taken the precaution of wrapping that entire entry-way with barbed wire.  The only issue with barbed wire in this day and age is that once spotted, it can be avoided.  @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen) ignites their rocket boots, attempting to vault over the death trap.  @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen) almost makes it, but is caught on their ankles, immediately becoming a tangled bloody mess in @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine)'s trap. Frantic, @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen) activates their shield generator which creates a kinetic field of energy around their body, and it successfully severs most of the barbed wire.  Limping, @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen) hustles towards the remainder of the delivery path, lobbing grenades over their shoulder.  As @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) manically runs after @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen) firing rounds in their direction, they are caught in one of @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen)'s grenades, losing a leg.  @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen) continues, hobbling, towards the delivery point.
20:38:51: @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) bludgeons @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen) unconscious with a large metal crowbar, laughing and dancing over their bloody mangled body.  "Parcel transferred."
20:39:59: @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) is on a roll, carving a violent swathe through everything in their path when they enter a crossroads.  Dangerous territory.  A field of Space Bastards, but @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) smiles.  Winners aren't born; they're built.  @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) lets loose a volley of grenades while igniting their rocket boots, soaring over the carnage below.  One failed attempt.  Two.  Three.  Four.  Each attempted theft of the package raises @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine)'s adrenaline.  @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen) fires a wrist mounted laser, signing the hip of @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine).  "Not today, my friend."  @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) twists in mid-air and strafes the area with bullets, hitting @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen) four times square in the torso and then resumes delivery.
20:40:04: @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen) does not normally mourn death.  @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen) is accustomed to the loss of those they meet, in one capacity or another.  But that last death.  A split second of @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen) thinking about it meant they were a split second too late on the trigger as @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) emerged from the parking garage, package in tow.  The shot missed.  @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) dove, taking a shot mid-air.  @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) was not thinking about human connection, unlike @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen).  This is arguably why @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen) was shot in the gut.  @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) resumes their delivery, package in tow.
20:40:11: @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) has been sucked into a portable black hole shot from @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen)'s MSK-8500 rifle, not only losing the package to @peepso_user_139(Jeff Colen), but flung to unknown reaches of the universe.  "Parcel transferred."
20:43:53: Package delivered by Jeff Colen for $200,000