15:57:07: Package picked up by Tharg The Mighty One
15:57:08: @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) stumbles into their own trap: a hole dug in the ground full of Ixyotik Death Wasps meant to ensure @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One)'s destruction. Instead @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) resumes on their way, @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson)'s agonizing screams ringing in their ears.
16:00:48: @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) is on a roll, carving a violent swathe through everything in their path when they enter a crossroads. Dangerous territory. A field of Space Bastards, but @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) smiles. Winners aren't born; they're built. @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) lets loose a volley of grenades while igniting their rocket boots, soaring over the carnage below. One failed attempt. Two. Three. Four. Each attempted theft of the package raises @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One)'s adrenaline. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) fires a wrist mounted laser, signing the hip of @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One). "Not today, my friend." @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) twists in mid-air and strafes the area with bullets, hitting @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) four times square in the torso and then resumes delivery.
17:38:59: @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) is on a roll, carving a violent swathe through everything in their path when they enter a crossroads. Dangerous territory. A field of Space Bastards, but @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) smiles. Winners aren't born; they're built. @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) lets loose a volley of grenades while igniting their rocket boots, soaring over the carnage below. One failed attempt. Two. Three. Four. Each attempted theft of the package raises @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One)'s adrenaline. @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) fires a wrist mounted laser, signing the hip of @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One). "Not today, my friend." @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) twists in mid-air and strafes the area with bullets, hitting @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) four times square in the torso and then resumes delivery.
18:30:07: @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) is on a roll, carving a violent swathe through everything in their path when they enter a crossroads. Dangerous territory. A field of Space Bastards, but @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) smiles. Winners aren't born; they're built. @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) lets loose a volley of grenades while igniting their rocket boots, soaring over the carnage below. One failed attempt. Two. Three. Four. Each attempted theft of the package raises @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One)'s adrenaline. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) fires a wrist mounted laser, signing the hip of @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One). "Not today, my friend." @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) twists in mid-air and strafes the area with bullets, hitting @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) four times square in the torso and then resumes delivery.
19:22:05: The delivery point only has one way in, about a hundred yards away from a gated entry. @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) has taken the precaution of wrapping that entire entry-way with barbed wire. The only issue with barbed wire in this day and age is that once spotted, it can be avoided. @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) ignites their rocket boots, attempting to vault over the death trap. @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) almost makes it, but is caught on their ankles, immediately becoming a tangled bloody mess in @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson)'s trap. Frantic, @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) activates their shield generator which creates a kinetic field of energy around their body, and it successfully severs most of the barbed wire. Limping, @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) hustles towards the remainder of the delivery path, lobbing grenades over their shoulder. As @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) manically runs after @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) firing rounds in their direction, they are caught in one of @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One)'s grenades, losing a leg. @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) continues, hobbling, towards the delivery point.
20:06:06: The delivery point only has one way in, about a hundred yards away from a gated entry. @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) has taken the precaution of wrapping that entire entry-way with barbed wire. The only issue with barbed wire in this day and age is that once spotted, it can be avoided. @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) ignites their rocket boots, attempting to vault over the death trap. @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) almost makes it, but is caught on their ankles, immediately becoming a tangled bloody mess in @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson)'s trap. Frantic, @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) activates their shield generator which creates a kinetic field of energy around their body, and it successfully severs most of the barbed wire. Limping, @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) hustles towards the remainder of the delivery path, lobbing grenades over their shoulder. As @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) manically runs after @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) firing rounds in their direction, they are caught in one of @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One)'s grenades, losing a leg. @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) continues, hobbling, towards the delivery point.
21:08:59: @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) misses their double-fisted pistol shots. A sad attempt involving a total of 24 rounds fired at @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One). @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) resumes delivery of their package.
22:04:13: Someone once told @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) the best way to handle this job is like it's personal. Not business. @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) got one over on @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) once before. So definitely, for @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco), that advice hits close to the chest. No guns. Not this time. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) stakes out the area. Hides in the shadows. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) see's @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) running hurriedly down the street. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) takes one last look at the triple barrel sawed-off shotgun in their sling. Certainly safer. No. It's time for revenge. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) ducks out of the corner, an electrically charged knife in a firm grip. @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) doesn't even skip a beat, slicing downward with a chainsaw that @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) did not see before. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) takes a long horrified look at their severed limb on the ground, still clutching the knife, and then once more up to see @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) escaping with the package still in tow far down the road. Don't worry. The Intergalactic Postal Service has excellent health coverage for limb replacement.
00:39:27: Package delivered by Tharg The Mighty One for $160,000