12:35:17: Package picked up by Corvus Wyatt
12:35:18: @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) stumbles into their own trap: a hole dug in the ground full of Ixyotik Death Wasps meant to ensure @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s destruction. Instead @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) resumes on their way, @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson)'s agonizing screams ringing in their ears.
13:13:43: @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) stumbles into their own trap: a hole dug in the ground full of Ixyotik Death Wasps meant to ensure @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s destruction. Instead @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) resumes on their way, @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson)'s agonizing screams ringing in their ears.
13:28:24: @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) leaps off of a second story building on to a tall dumpster, shortening the fall. Unfortunately this dumpster is full of explosives placed by @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter). @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) smiles as they plunge their thumb onto the detonator switch, their face ignited by a pillar of flames as @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) is incinerated. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) throws the detonator over their shoulder as they pick up the package that rolls to their feet as if it was meant for them. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) breaks into a fast run, taking the stolen package with them. "Parcel transferred," emits from their delivery bracelet signifying even more credits to be earned. "Parcel transferred, indeed," @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) whispers in reply.
13:46:04: @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) was feeling THAT feeling. The feeling of the win just over the horizon. A smile crept across @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter)'s face, thinking of exactly what they would use these credits to purchase, when @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) launched an electrified bola at their feet. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) can't quite internalize that the most painful step is also the most confident, as a dart is lodged into their neck before @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter)'s head even hits the ground, bringing on many hours of sleep. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) smiles as their delivery bracelet emits the familiar "Parcel transferred" message.
14:02:19: Today started as a uniquely bright one for @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco). A wonderful breakfast. "Have a great day at the service," and a kiss from their lover. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) mused, "Why ruin a good thing? I'll steal a package instead of being the idiot that always starts a delivery." @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) took their time, looking at the myriad of packages currently traversing the universe as well as the armaments at their disposal. "Ah, that's the one. I'm here already." @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) put on their favorite guilty pleasure of a song on an audio device, and hummed along, out of tune, as they laid down a multi-celled rocket launcher in the middle of the street on a hefty tripod. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) crouched a fair distance away, readying their goggles and watching for @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) to come running down the road, package in tow. "I know this one. Never been able to handle their Zygerian Rum. They won't be able to handle this either." @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) came into view. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) pushed the hand-held trigger mechanism. Suddenly, the rocket launcher whirled on it's pivot, pointing at the abode @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) had just left. "What? How?" As the rockets burnt the denizens inside to a crisp, @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) barely heard @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) running by shouting, "Always pack a signal disrupter, dickhead!" @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) continued on without breaking a step, the package remaining in tow.
14:08:10: @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) fires two pistol shots at @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s kneecaps, dropping them to their knees. "Parcel transferred."
14:19:37: @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) is impaled on a lengthy spear with a laser tip by @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) after a failed package theft attempt. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) resumes on their way.
14:19:41: Someone once told @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) that the best way to handle this job is if you keep it strictly business. Not personal. Do not concern yourself with revenge. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) knows @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) has stolen one too many packages from them before, but brushes the sweat from their brow, banishing that memory. The heaviness of the EK40 surface to air missile launcher is starting to wear on @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) but the time is almost here. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter)'s ship comes over the horizon. There it is. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s finger closes around the trigger loosely, causing the launcher to commence lock-on. A small repetitive beep turns into a single tone, signaling the moment for action. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) is surprised however as the rocket launches behind them instead of in front due to user error. This mistake would sting @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) the most, if not for the tower of rocket fuel they have chosen as their location. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter)'s ship rolls successfully by the towering pyre of incinerating flame, package still in tow.
14:19:45: @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) is bloody from head to toe after a rough number of successful entanglements. "Geronimo, fuckstick!" They look up at the voice and see a a dot in the sky. It quickly turns into two dots: a sky born @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) on a rocket powered hang-glider, and the portable thermonuclear device they've dropped. "Parcel transferred," can be heard from dispatch as @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) swoops past the mangled corpse and snags the package.
14:23:45: @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) stumbles into their own trap: a hole dug in the ground full of Ixyotik Death Wasps meant to ensure @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s destruction. Instead @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) resumes on their way, @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter)'s agonizing screams ringing in their ears.
14:23:57: Someone once told @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) that the best way to handle this job is if you keep it strictly business. Not personal. Do not concern yourself with revenge. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) knows @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) has stolen one too many packages from them before, but brushes the sweat from their brow, banishing that memory. The heaviness of the EK40 surface to air missile launcher is starting to wear on @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) but the time is almost here. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s ship comes over the horizon. There it is. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter)'s finger closes around the trigger loosely, causing the launcher to commence lock-on. A small repetitive beep turns into a single tone, signaling the moment for action. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) is surprised however as the rocket launches behind them instead of in front due to user error. This mistake would sting @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) the most, if not for the tower of rocket fuel they have chosen as their location. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s ship rolls successfully by the towering pyre of incinerating flame, package still in tow.
14:35:11: @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) fires two pistol shots at @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s kneecaps, dropping them to their knees. "Parcel transferred."
14:35:43: @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) is on a roll, carving a violent swathe through everything in their path when they enter a crossroads. Dangerous territory. A field of Space Bastards, but @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) smiles. Winners aren't born; they're built. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) lets loose a volley of grenades while igniting their rocket boots, soaring over the carnage below. One failed attempt. Two. Three. Four. Each attempted theft of the package raises @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter)'s adrenaline. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) fires a wrist mounted laser, signing the hip of @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter). "Not today, my friend." @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) twists in mid-air and strafes the area with bullets, hitting @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) four times square in the torso and then resumes delivery.
14:36:25: As @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) rounds a corner, they are distracted for more than a split second by a hastily posted cardboard cut-out of a Zyxxan Hound fornicating with a famous human politician from centuries before. This momentarily lapse in focus is all @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) needs in order to slam a large whirring chainsaw into the chest of @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter). "Parcel transferred."
14:39:56: @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) was running at break-neck speed and rounded a blind corner, stumbling upon a laser trip mine placed by @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter). Luckily, @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) vaulted over it, only severing one foot. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) resumes delivery with package in tow, albeit slightly hobbling.
14:40:00: @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) is bloody from head to toe after a rough number of successful entanglements. "Geronimo, fuckstick!" They look up at the voice and see a a dot in the sky. It quickly turns into two dots: a sky born @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) on a rocket powered hang-glider, and the portable thermonuclear device they've dropped. "Parcel transferred," can be heard from dispatch as @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) swoops past the mangled corpse and snags the package.
15:01:41: @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) misses their double-fisted pistol shots. A sad attempt involving a total of 24 rounds fired at @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter). @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) resumes delivery of their package.
15:01:51: @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) stumbles into their own trap: a hole dug in the ground full of Ixyotik Death Wasps meant to ensure @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter)'s destruction. Instead @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) resumes on their way, @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s agonizing screams ringing in their ears.
15:01:54: @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) bludgeons @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) unconscious with a large metal crowbar, laughing and dancing over their bloody mangled body. "Parcel transferred."
15:20:19: Today started as a uniquely bright one for @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine). A wonderful breakfast. "Have a great day at the service," and a kiss from their lover. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) mused, "Why ruin a good thing? I'll steal a package instead of being the idiot that always starts a delivery." @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) took their time, looking at the myriad of packages currently traversing the universe as well as the armaments at their disposal. "Ah, that's the one. I'm here already." @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) put on their favorite guilty pleasure of a song on an audio device, and hummed along, out of tune, as they laid down a multi-celled rocket launcher in the middle of the street on a hefty tripod. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) crouched a fair distance away, readying their goggles and watching for @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) to come running down the road, package in tow. "I know this one. Never been able to handle their Zygerian Rum. They won't be able to handle this either." @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) came into view. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) pushed the hand-held trigger mechanism. Suddenly, the rocket launcher whirled on it's pivot, pointing at the abode @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) had just left. "What? How?" As the rockets burnt the denizens inside to a crisp, @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) barely heard @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) running by shouting, "Always pack a signal disrupter, dickhead!" @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) continued on without breaking a step, the package remaining in tow.
15:20:24: @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) is impaled on a lengthy spear with a laser tip by @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) after a failed package theft attempt. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) resumes on their way.
15:20:31: Someone once told @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) that the best way to handle this job is if you keep it strictly business. Not personal. Do not concern yourself with revenge. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) knows @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) has stolen one too many packages from them before, but brushes the sweat from their brow, banishing that memory. The heaviness of the EK40 surface to air missile launcher is starting to wear on @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) but the time is almost here. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s ship comes over the horizon. There it is. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine)'s finger closes around the trigger loosely, causing the launcher to commence lock-on. A small repetitive beep turns into a single tone, signaling the moment for action. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) is surprised however as the rocket launches behind them instead of in front due to user error. This mistake would sting @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) the most, if not for the tower of rocket fuel they have chosen as their location. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s ship rolls successfully by the towering pyre of incinerating flame, package still in tow.
15:20:36: @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) was running at break-neck speed and rounded a blind corner, stumbling upon a laser trip mine placed by @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine). Luckily, @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) vaulted over it, only severing one foot. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) resumes delivery with package in tow, albeit slightly hobbling.
15:20:44: @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine)'s ship rams head-first into @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s ship, utilizing a superheated prow to disintegrate @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s cockpit. The package is snagged by @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) after a daring space walk. "Parcel transferred."
15:58:36: The delivery point only has one way in, about a hundred yards away from a gated entry. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) has taken the precaution of wrapping that entire entry-way with barbed wire. The only issue with barbed wire in this day and age is that once spotted, it can be avoided. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) ignites their rocket boots, attempting to vault over the death trap. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) almost makes it, but is caught on their ankles, immediately becoming a tangled bloody mess in @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter)'s trap. Frantic, @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) activates their shield generator which creates a kinetic field of energy around their body, and it successfully severs most of the barbed wire. Limping, @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) hustles towards the remainder of the delivery path, lobbing grenades over their shoulder. As @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) manically runs after @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) firing rounds in their direction, they are caught in one of @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine)'s grenades, losing a leg. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) continues, hobbling, towards the delivery point.
15:58:40: Someone once told @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) the best way to handle this job is like it's personal. Not business. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) got one over on @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) once before. So definitely, for @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter), that advice hits close to the chest. No guns. Not this time. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) stakes out the area. Hides in the shadows. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) see's @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) running hurriedly down the street. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) takes one last look at the triple barrel sawed-off shotgun in their sling. Certainly safer. No. It's time for revenge. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) ducks out of the corner, an electrically charged knife in a firm grip. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) doesn't even skip a beat, slicing downward with a chainsaw that @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) did not see before. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) takes a long horrified look at their severed limb on the ground, still clutching the knife, and then once more up to see @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) escaping with the package still in tow far down the road. Don't worry. The Intergalactic Postal Service has excellent health coverage for limb replacement.
15:58:53: @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) does not normally mourn death. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) is accustomed to the loss of those they meet, in one capacity or another. But that last death. A split second of @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) thinking about it meant they were a split second too late on the trigger as @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) emerged from the parking garage, package in tow. The shot missed. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) dove, taking a shot mid-air. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) was not thinking about human connection, unlike @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter). This is arguably why @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) was shot in the gut. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) resumes their delivery, package in tow.
15:58:56: @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) stumbles into their own trap: a hole dug in the ground full of Ixyotik Death Wasps meant to ensure @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine)'s destruction. Instead @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) resumes on their way, @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter)'s agonizing screams ringing in their ears.
15:58:59: @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) is riddled with repetitive machine gun fire from @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter), falling to their knees and letting the package slip from their fingers. "Parcel transferred." @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) resumes delivery with the package.
16:00:33: Today started as a uniquely bright one for @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco). A wonderful breakfast. "Have a great day at the service," and a kiss from their lover. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) mused, "Why ruin a good thing? I'll steal a package instead of being the idiot that always starts a delivery." @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) took their time, looking at the myriad of packages currently traversing the universe as well as the armaments at their disposal. "Ah, that's the one. I'm here already." @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) put on their favorite guilty pleasure of a song on an audio device, and hummed along, out of tune, as they laid down a multi-celled rocket launcher in the middle of the street on a hefty tripod. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) crouched a fair distance away, readying their goggles and watching for @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) to come running down the road, package in tow. "I know this one. Never been able to handle their Zygerian Rum. They won't be able to handle this either." @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) came into view. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) pushed the hand-held trigger mechanism. Suddenly, the rocket launcher whirled on it's pivot, pointing at the abode @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) had just left. "What? How?" As the rockets burnt the denizens inside to a crisp, @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) barely heard @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) running by shouting, "Always pack a signal disrupter, dickhead!" @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) continued on without breaking a step, the package remaining in tow.
16:04:29: @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) bludgeons @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) unconscious with a large metal crowbar, laughing and dancing over their bloody mangled body. "Parcel transferred."
17:07:01: @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) tried to sneak on board @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine)'s ship but a security robot detected and repelled the attempt. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) continues their delivery.
17:39:41: @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) has managed to somehow evade theft of the package thus far. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) is feeling good. DAMN good. Unfortunately that feeling is momentarily suspended as a shot rings out, severing a cable holding up a net full of 700 pounds of refuse with a sign that has "Eat My Fuck - Cheers, @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)" scrawled on it in pink paint. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) picks up the package which lies next to the mangled limbs of @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine). Fuck eaten. Good job, @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt). "Parcel Transferred." You have the package. Now get that sucker to the finish line.
18:00:34: @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) is impaled on a lengthy spear with a laser tip by @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) after a failed package theft attempt. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) resumes on their way.
18:21:54: @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) has been sucked into a portable black hole shot from @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine)'s MSK-8500 rifle, not only losing the package to @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine), but flung to unknown reaches of the universe. "Parcel transferred."
18:23:00: The delivery point only has one way in, about a hundred yards away from a gated entry. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) has taken the precaution of wrapping that entire entry-way with barbed wire. The only issue with barbed wire in this day and age is that once spotted, it can be avoided. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) ignites their rocket boots, attempting to vault over the death trap. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) almost makes it, but is caught on their ankles, immediately becoming a tangled bloody mess in @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter)'s trap. Frantic, @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) activates their shield generator which creates a kinetic field of energy around their body, and it successfully severs most of the barbed wire. Limping, @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) hustles towards the remainder of the delivery path, lobbing grenades over their shoulder. As @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) manically runs after @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) firing rounds in their direction, they are caught in one of @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine)'s grenades, losing a leg. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) continues, hobbling, towards the delivery point.
18:23:04: @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) tried to sneak on board @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine)'s ship but a security robot detected and repelled the attempt. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) continues their delivery.
18:23:09: @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) is impaled on a lengthy spear with a laser tip by @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) after a failed package theft attempt. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) resumes on their way.
18:23:11: @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) successfully spears @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) to a wall through their chest. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) has time to yell, "You bastard," as @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) snags the package from the ground in front of them. "Parcel transferred."
18:24:54: @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) is on a roll, carving a violent swathe through everything in their path when they enter a crossroads. Dangerous territory. A field of Space Bastards, but @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) smiles. Winners aren't born; they're built. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) lets loose a volley of grenades while igniting their rocket boots, soaring over the carnage below. One failed attempt. Two. Three. Four. Each attempted theft of the package raises @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter)'s adrenaline. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) fires a wrist mounted laser, signing the hip of @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter). "Not today, my friend." @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) twists in mid-air and strafes the area with bullets, hitting @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) four times square in the torso and then resumes delivery.
18:24:57: @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine)'s ship fires two nuclear torpedos into @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter)'s ship, instantly incinerating it. The package is snagged by a lengthy magnetic tow cable. "Parcel transferred."
18:25:13: @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) is on a roll, carving a violent swathe through everything in their path when they enter a crossroads. Dangerous territory. A field of Space Bastards, but @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) smiles. Winners aren't born; they're built. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) lets loose a volley of grenades while igniting their rocket boots, soaring over the carnage below. One failed attempt. Two. Three. Four. Each attempted theft of the package raises @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine)'s adrenaline. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) fires a wrist mounted laser, signing the hip of @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine). "Not today, my friend." @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) twists in mid-air and strafes the area with bullets, hitting @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) four times square in the torso and then resumes delivery.
18:25:19: @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) stumbles into their own trap: a hole dug in the ground full of Ixyotik Death Wasps meant to ensure @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine)'s destruction. Instead @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) resumes on their way, @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s agonizing screams ringing in their ears.
18:25:27: @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) misses their double-fisted pistol shots. A sad attempt involving a total of 24 rounds fired at @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine). @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) resumes delivery of their package.
18:25:30: The delivery point only has one way in, about a hundred yards away from a gated entry. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) has taken the precaution of wrapping that entire entry-way with barbed wire. The only issue with barbed wire in this day and age is that once spotted, it can be avoided. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) ignites their rocket boots, attempting to vault over the death trap. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) almost makes it, but is caught on their ankles, immediately becoming a tangled bloody mess in @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s trap. Frantic, @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) activates their shield generator which creates a kinetic field of energy around their body, and it successfully severs most of the barbed wire. Limping, @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) hustles towards the remainder of the delivery path, lobbing grenades over their shoulder. As @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) manically runs after @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) firing rounds in their direction, they are caught in one of @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine)'s grenades, losing a leg. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) continues, hobbling, towards the delivery point.
18:25:35: The smell of @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine)'s completely immolated ship flares up @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s nostrils as a tow cable yanks the package from the flaming wreck. "Parcel transferred" emit's from @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s bracelet, signaling more credits to be made. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) continues towards the delivery point, package in tow.
18:34:21: Someone once told @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) the best way to handle this job is like it's personal. Not business. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) got one over on @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) once before. So definitely, for @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter), that advice hits close to the chest. No guns. Not this time. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) stakes out the area. Hides in the shadows. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) see's @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) running hurriedly down the street. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) takes one last look at the triple barrel sawed-off shotgun in their sling. Certainly safer. No. It's time for revenge. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) ducks out of the corner, an electrically charged knife in a firm grip. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) doesn't even skip a beat, slicing downward with a chainsaw that @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) did not see before. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) takes a long horrified look at their severed limb on the ground, still clutching the knife, and then once more up to see @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) escaping with the package still in tow far down the road. Don't worry. The Intergalactic Postal Service has excellent health coverage for limb replacement.
18:34:25: @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) leaps off of a second story building on to a tall dumpster, shortening the fall. Unfortunately this dumpster is full of explosives placed by @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter). @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) smiles as they plunge their thumb onto the detonator switch, their face ignited by a pillar of flames as @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) is incinerated. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) throws the detonator over their shoulder as they pick up the package that rolls to their feet as if it was meant for them. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) breaks into a fast run, taking the stolen package with them. "Parcel transferred," emits from their delivery bracelet signifying even more credits to be earned. "Parcel transferred, indeed," @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) whispers in reply.
18:37:09: @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) is bloody from head to toe after a rough number of successful entanglements. "Geronimo, fuckstick!" They look up at the voice and see a a dot in the sky. It quickly turns into two dots: a sky born @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) on a rocket powered hang-glider, and the portable thermonuclear device they've dropped. "Parcel transferred," can be heard from dispatch as @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) swoops past the mangled corpse and snags the package.
18:47:38: @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) leaps off of a second story building on to a tall dumpster, shortening the fall. Unfortunately this dumpster is full of explosives placed by @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt). @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) smiles as they plunge their thumb onto the detonator switch, their face ignited by a pillar of flames as @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) is incinerated. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) throws the detonator over their shoulder as they pick up the package that rolls to their feet as if it was meant for them. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) breaks into a fast run, taking the stolen package with them. "Parcel transferred," emits from their delivery bracelet signifying even more credits to be earned. "Parcel transferred, indeed," @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) whispers in reply.
19:03:28: @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) was running at break-neck speed and rounded a blind corner, stumbling upon a laser trip mine placed by @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson). Luckily, @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) vaulted over it, only severing one foot. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) resumes delivery with package in tow, albeit slightly hobbling.
19:11:07: The wonderful thing about lasers, although expensive, is their ability to slice entirely through a surface and sever. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) rounds a corner and only has a split second to see a blinding red light, before being decapitated by a slicingly accurate laser blast from @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter). The package rolls to their feet. "Parcel transferred." @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) resumes delivery of the stolen package.
19:16:13: @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) stumbles into their own trap: a hole dug in the ground full of Ixyotik Death Wasps meant to ensure @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter)'s destruction. Instead @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) resumes on their way, @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s agonizing screams ringing in their ears.
19:16:19: The delivery point only has one way in, about a hundred yards away from a gated entry. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) has taken the precaution of wrapping that entire entry-way with barbed wire. The only issue with barbed wire in this day and age is that once spotted, it can be avoided. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) ignites their rocket boots, attempting to vault over the death trap. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) almost makes it, but is caught on their ankles, immediately becoming a tangled bloody mess in @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s trap. Frantic, @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) activates their shield generator which creates a kinetic field of energy around their body, and it successfully severs most of the barbed wire. Limping, @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) hustles towards the remainder of the delivery path, lobbing grenades over their shoulder. As @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) manically runs after @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) firing rounds in their direction, they are caught in one of @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter)'s grenades, losing a leg. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) continues, hobbling, towards the delivery point.
19:16:33: @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) fires two pistol shots at @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter)'s kneecaps, dropping them to their knees. "Parcel transferred."
19:24:23: Someone once told @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) that the best way to handle this job is if you keep it strictly business. Not personal. Do not concern yourself with revenge. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) knows @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) has stolen one too many packages from them before, but brushes the sweat from their brow, banishing that memory. The heaviness of the EK40 surface to air missile launcher is starting to wear on @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) but the time is almost here. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s ship comes over the horizon. There it is. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter)'s finger closes around the trigger loosely, causing the launcher to commence lock-on. A small repetitive beep turns into a single tone, signaling the moment for action. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) is surprised however as the rocket launches behind them instead of in front due to user error. This mistake would sting @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) the most, if not for the tower of rocket fuel they have chosen as their location. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s ship rolls successfully by the towering pyre of incinerating flame, package still in tow.
19:24:28: @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) is on a roll, carving a violent swathe through everything in their path when they enter a crossroads. Dangerous territory. A field of Space Bastards, but @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) smiles. Winners aren't born; they're built. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) lets loose a volley of grenades while igniting their rocket boots, soaring over the carnage below. One failed attempt. Two. Three. Four. Each attempted theft of the package raises @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s adrenaline. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) fires a wrist mounted laser, signing the hip of @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt). "Not today, my friend." @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) twists in mid-air and strafes the area with bullets, hitting @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) four times square in the torso and then resumes delivery.
19:24:32: @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) is impaled on a lengthy spear with a laser tip by @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) after a failed package theft attempt. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) resumes on their way.
19:24:34: @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter)'s ship rams head-first into @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s ship, utilizing a superheated prow to disintegrate @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s cockpit. The package is snagged by @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) after a daring space walk. "Parcel transferred."
19:35:25: @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) is bloody from head to toe after a rough number of successful entanglements. "Geronimo, fuckstick!" They look up at the voice and see a a dot in the sky. It quickly turns into two dots: a sky born @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) on a rocket powered hang-glider, and the portable thermonuclear device they've dropped. "Parcel transferred," can be heard from dispatch as @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) swoops past the mangled corpse and snags the package.
20:00:23: @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) was running at break-neck speed and rounded a blind corner, stumbling upon a laser trip mine placed by @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson). Luckily, @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) vaulted over it, only severing one foot. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) resumes delivery with package in tow, albeit slightly hobbling.
20:03:21: @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) stumbles into their own trap: a hole dug in the ground full of Ixyotik Death Wasps meant to ensure @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine)'s destruction. Instead @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) resumes on their way, @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter)'s agonizing screams ringing in their ears.
20:03:24: The smell of @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine)'s completely immolated ship flares up @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter)'s nostrils as a tow cable yanks the package from the flaming wreck. "Parcel transferred" emit's from @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter)'s bracelet, signaling more credits to be made. @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) continues towards the delivery point, package in tow.
20:07:29: @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) misses their double-fisted pistol shots. A sad attempt involving a total of 24 rounds fired at @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter). @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) resumes delivery of their package.
20:07:33: @peepso_user_66(Toe Cutter) is bloody from head to toe after a rough number of successful entanglements. "Geronimo, fuckstick!" They look up at the voice and see a a dot in the sky. It quickly turns into two dots: a sky born @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) on a rocket powered hang-glider, and the portable thermonuclear device they've dropped. "Parcel transferred," can be heard from dispatch as @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) swoops past the mangled corpse and snags the package.
20:31:23: @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) is on a roll, carving a violent swathe through everything in their path when they enter a crossroads. Dangerous territory. A field of Space Bastards, but @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) smiles. Winners aren't born; they're built. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) lets loose a volley of grenades while igniting their rocket boots, soaring over the carnage below. One failed attempt. Two. Three. Four. Each attempted theft of the package raises @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine)'s adrenaline. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) fires a wrist mounted laser, signing the hip of @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine). "Not today, my friend." @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) twists in mid-air and strafes the area with bullets, hitting @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) four times square in the torso and then resumes delivery.
20:31:27: There are automatic rifles and there are these. The GZNKA tank killer is surprisingly light as @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) hefts it on their shoulder. The rounds are known to puncture holes two feet wide through heavy ship armor, and are held in a backpack and fed via sling. It is this reason alone that @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) has used it, targeting @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine)'s ship as it races across the horizon. However, @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine)'s ship is not only retrofitted with two meter thick armor, but also an electronic shielding system. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s rounds do find their way through the shields, but only make it one foot into the armor. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) dips their ship, skirting past @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) and giving them third degree thruster burns across half of their body.
20:34:57: @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) tried to sneak on board @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine)'s ship but a security robot detected and repelled the attempt. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) continues their delivery.
20:35:01: The delivery point only has one way in, about a hundred yards away from a gated entry. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) has taken the precaution of wrapping that entire entry-way with barbed wire. The only issue with barbed wire in this day and age is that once spotted, it can be avoided. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) ignites their rocket boots, attempting to vault over the death trap. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) almost makes it, but is caught on their ankles, immediately becoming a tangled bloody mess in @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s trap. Frantic, @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) activates their shield generator which creates a kinetic field of energy around their body, and it successfully severs most of the barbed wire. Limping, @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) hustles towards the remainder of the delivery path, lobbing grenades over their shoulder. As @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) manically runs after @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) firing rounds in their direction, they are caught in one of @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine)'s grenades, losing a leg. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) continues, hobbling, towards the delivery point.
20:35:06: The wonderful thing about lasers, although expensive, is their ability to slice entirely through a surface and sever. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) rounds a corner and only has a split second to see a blinding red light, before being decapitated by a slicingly accurate laser blast from @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt). The package rolls to their feet. "Parcel transferred." @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) resumes delivery of the stolen package.
20:35:19: Package delivered by Corvus Wyatt for $1,400,000