06:13:32: Package picked up by Sonny Bill Spider
06:13:33: Sonny Bill Spider fights off Ignoracious Buttafucco and gets to keep the package
07:00:43: Ignoracious Buttafucco misses their double-fisted pistol shots. A sad attempt involving a total of 24 rounds fired at Sonny Bill Spider. Sonny Bill Spider resumes delivery of their package.
08:00:21: Someone once told Blaylock Samson the best way to handle this job is like it's personal. Not business. Sonny Bill Spider got one over on Blaylock Samson once before. So definitely, for Blaylock Samson, that advice hits close to the chest. No guns. Not this time. Blaylock Samson stakes out the area. Hides in the shadows. Blaylock Samson see's Sonny Bill Spider running hurriedly down the street. Blaylock Samson takes one last look at the triple barrel sawed-off shotgun in their sling. Certainly safer. No. It's time for revenge. Blaylock Samson ducks out of the corner, an electrically charged knife in a firm grip. Sonny Bill Spider doesn't even skip a beat, slicing downward with a chainsaw that Blaylock Samson did not see before. Blaylock Samson takes a long horrified look at their severed limb on the ground, still clutching the knife, and then once more up to see Sonny Bill Spider escaping with the package still in tow far down the road. Don't worry. The Intergalactic Postal Service has excellent health coverage for limb replacement.
09:00:21: Sonny Bill Spider is on a roll, carving a violent swathe through everything in their path when they enter a crossroads. Dangerous territory. A field of Space Bastards, but Sonny Bill Spider smiles. Winners aren't born; they're built. Sonny Bill Spider lets loose a volley of grenades while igniting their rocket boots, soaring over the carnage below. One failed attempt. Two. Three. Four. Each attempted theft of the package raises Sonny Bill Spider's adrenaline. Blaylock Samson fires a wrist mounted laser, signing the hip of Sonny Bill Spider. "Not today, my friend." Sonny Bill Spider twists in mid-air and strafes the area with bullets, hitting Blaylock Samson four times square in the torso and then resumes delivery.
10:00:23: Ignoracious Buttafucco tried to sneak on board Sonny Bill Spider's ship but a security robot detected and repelled the attempt. Sonny Bill Spider continues their delivery.
10:14:31: Package delivered by Sonny Bill Spider for $100,000