14:52:14: Package picked up by Shadowrabbit Clayguy
14:52:16: Today started as a uniquely bright one for @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco).  A wonderful breakfast.  "Have a great day at the service," and a kiss from their lover.  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) mused, "Why ruin a good thing?  I'll steal a package instead of being the idiot that always starts a delivery."  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) took their time, looking at the myriad of packages currently traversing the universe as well as the armaments at their disposal.  "Ah, that's the one.  I'm here already."  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) put on their favorite guilty pleasure of a song on an audio device, and hummed along, out of tune, as they laid down a multi-celled rocket launcher in the middle of the street on a hefty tripod.  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) crouched a fair distance away, readying their goggles and watching for @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) to come running down the road, package in tow.  "I know this one.  Never been able to handle their Zygerian Rum.  They won't be able to handle this either."  @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) came into view.  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) pushed the hand-held trigger mechanism.  Suddenly, the rocket launcher whirled on it's pivot, pointing at the abode @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) had just left.  "What?  How?"  As the rockets burnt the denizens inside to a crisp, @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) barely heard @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) running by shouting, "Always pack a signal disrupter, dickhead!"  @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) continued on without breaking a step, the package remaining in tow.
15:03:29: @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) does not normally mourn death.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) is accustomed to the loss of those they meet, in one capacity or another.  But that last death.  A split second of @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) thinking about it meant they were a split second too late on the trigger as @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) emerged from the parking garage, package in tow.  The shot missed.  @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) dove, taking a shot mid-air.  @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) was not thinking about human connection, unlike @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson).  This is arguably why @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) was shot in the gut.  @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) resumes their delivery, package in tow.
16:02:25: @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) tried to sneak on board @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy)'s ship but a security robot detected and repelled the attempt.  @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) continues their delivery.
17:00:43: Today started as a uniquely bright one for @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson).  A wonderful breakfast.  "Have a great day at the service," and a kiss from their lover.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) mused, "Why ruin a good thing?  I'll steal a package instead of being the idiot that always starts a delivery."  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) took their time, looking at the myriad of packages currently traversing the universe as well as the armaments at their disposal.  "Ah, that's the one.  I'm here already."  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) put on their favorite guilty pleasure of a song on an audio device, and hummed along, out of tune, as they laid down a multi-celled rocket launcher in the middle of the street on a hefty tripod.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) crouched a fair distance away, readying their goggles and watching for @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) to come running down the road, package in tow.  "I know this one.  Never been able to handle their Zygerian Rum.  They won't be able to handle this either."  @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) came into view.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) pushed the hand-held trigger mechanism.  Suddenly, the rocket launcher whirled on it's pivot, pointing at the abode @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) had just left.  "What?  How?"  As the rockets burnt the denizens inside to a crisp, @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) barely heard @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) running by shouting, "Always pack a signal disrupter, dickhead!"  @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) continued on without breaking a step, the package remaining in tow.
18:02:37: @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) steadily took aim from a second story window as @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) ran by below.  Sweat dotting their forehead, @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) inhaled sharply and squeezed the trigger.  It was a miss.  @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) resumes delivery, trying to ignore the echoing rifle shot and fragments of wall exploding just overhead.
19:01:17: Today started as a uniquely bright one for @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco).  A wonderful breakfast.  "Have a great day at the service," and a kiss from their lover.  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) mused, "Why ruin a good thing?  I'll steal a package instead of being the idiot that always starts a delivery."  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) took their time, looking at the myriad of packages currently traversing the universe as well as the armaments at their disposal.  "Ah, that's the one.  I'm here already."  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) put on their favorite guilty pleasure of a song on an audio device, and hummed along, out of tune, as they laid down a multi-celled rocket launcher in the middle of the street on a hefty tripod.  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) crouched a fair distance away, readying their goggles and watching for @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) to come running down the road, package in tow.  "I know this one.  Never been able to handle their Zygerian Rum.  They won't be able to handle this either."  @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) came into view.  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) pushed the hand-held trigger mechanism.  Suddenly, the rocket launcher whirled on it's pivot, pointing at the abode @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) had just left.  "What?  How?"  As the rockets burnt the denizens inside to a crisp, @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) barely heard @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) running by shouting, "Always pack a signal disrupter, dickhead!"  @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) continued on without breaking a step, the package remaining in tow.
20:05:30: There are automatic rifles and there are these.  The GZNKA tank killer is surprisingly light as @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) hefts it on their shoulder.  The rounds are known to puncture holes two feet wide through heavy ship armor, and are held in a backpack and fed via sling.  It is this reason alone that @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) has used it, targeting @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy)'s ship as it races across the horizon.  However, @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy)'s ship is not only retrofitted with two meter thick armor, but also an electronic shielding system.  @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson)'s rounds do find their way through the shields, but only make it one foot into the armor.  @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) dips their ship, skirting past @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) and giving them third degree thruster burns across half of their body.
21:00:08: Someone once told @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) the best way to handle this job is like it's personal.  Not business.  @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) got one over on @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) once before.  So definitely, for @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson), that advice hits close to the chest.  No guns.  Not this time.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) stakes out the area.  Hides in the shadows.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) see's @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) running hurriedly down the street.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) takes one last look at the triple barrel sawed-off shotgun in their sling.  Certainly safer.  No.  It's time for revenge.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) ducks out of the corner, an electrically charged knife in a firm grip.  @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) doesn't even skip a beat, slicing downward with a chainsaw that @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) did not see before.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) takes a long horrified look at their severed limb on the ground, still clutching the knife, and then once more up to see @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) escaping with the package still in tow far down the road.  Don't worry.  The Intergalactic Postal Service has excellent health coverage for limb replacement.
22:04:30: @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) steadily took aim from a second story window as @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) ran by below.  Sweat dotting their forehead, @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) inhaled sharply and squeezed the trigger.  It was a miss.  @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) resumes delivery, trying to ignore the echoing rifle shot and fragments of wall exploding just overhead.
23:00:34: Package delivered by Shadowrabbit Clayguy for $180,000