01:30:22: Package picked up by Column McClowed
01:30:23: Mac Nielson steadily took aim from a second story window as Column McClowed ran by below.  Sweat dotting their forehead, Mac Nielson inhaled sharply and squeezed the trigger.  It was a miss.  Column McClowed resumes delivery, trying to ignore the echoing rifle shot and fragments of wall exploding just overhead.
01:58:50: Column McClowed was feeling THAT feeling.  The feeling of the win just over the horizon.  A smile crept across Column McClowed's face, thinking of exactly what they would use these credits to purchase, when Long Dread launched an electrified bola at their feet.  Column McClowed can't quite internalize that the most painful step is also the most confident, as a dart is lodged into their neck before Column McClowed's head even hits the ground, bringing on many hours of sleep.  Long Dread smiles as their delivery bracelet emits the familiar "Parcel transferred" message.
02:00:53: Today started as a uniquely bright one for Ignoracious Buttafucco.  A wonderful breakfast.  "Have a great day at the service," and a kiss from their lover.  Ignoracious Buttafucco mused, "Why ruin a good thing?  I'll steal a package instead of being the idiot that always starts a delivery."  Ignoracious Buttafucco took their time, looking at the myriad of packages currently traversing the universe as well as the armaments at their disposal.  "Ah, that's the one.  I'm here already."  Ignoracious Buttafucco put on their favorite guilty pleasure of a song on an audio device, and hummed along, out of tune, as they laid down a multi-celled rocket launcher in the middle of the street on a hefty tripod.  Ignoracious Buttafucco crouched a fair distance away, readying their goggles and watching for Long Dread to come running down the road, package in tow.  "I know this one.  Never been able to handle their Zygerian Rum.  They won't be able to handle this either."  Long Dread came into view.  Ignoracious Buttafucco pushed the hand-held trigger mechanism.  Suddenly, the rocket launcher whirled on it's pivot, pointing at the abode Ignoracious Buttafucco had just left.  "What?  How?"  As the rockets burnt the denizens inside to a crisp, Ignoracious Buttafucco barely heard Long Dread running by shouting, "Always pack a signal disrupter, dickhead!"  Long Dread continued on without breaking a step, the package remaining in tow.
02:30:53: Package delivered by Long Dread for $60,000