06:51:51: Package picked up by Long Dread
06:51:52: Blaylock Samson stumbles into their own trap: a hole dug in the ground full of Ixyotik Death Wasps meant to ensure Long Dread's destruction. Instead Long Dread resumes on their way, Blaylock Samson's agonizing screams ringing in their ears.
07:00:43: Long Dread is on a roll, carving a violent swathe through everything in their path when they enter a crossroads. Dangerous territory. A field of Space Bastards, but Long Dread smiles. Winners aren't born; they're built. Long Dread lets loose a volley of grenades while igniting their rocket boots, soaring over the carnage below. One failed attempt. Two. Three. Four. Each attempted theft of the package raises Long Dread's adrenaline. Ignoracious Buttafucco fires a wrist mounted laser, signing the hip of Long Dread. "Not today, my friend." Long Dread twists in mid-air and strafes the area with bullets, hitting Ignoracious Buttafucco four times square in the torso and then resumes delivery.
07:52:02: Long Dread is bloody from head to toe after a rough number of successful entanglements. "Geronimo, fuckstick!" They look up at the voice and see a a dot in the sky. It quickly turns into two dots: a sky born Feisty Gazebo on a rocket powered hang-glider, and the portable thermonuclear device they've dropped. "Parcel transferred," can be heard from dispatch as Feisty Gazebo swoops past the mangled corpse and snags the package.
08:00:43: Someone once told Ignoracious Buttafucco that the best way to handle this job is if you keep it strictly business. Not personal. Do not concern yourself with revenge. Ignoracious Buttafucco knows Feisty Gazebo has stolen one too many packages from them before, but brushes the sweat from their brow, banishing that memory. The heaviness of the EK40 surface to air missile launcher is starting to wear on Ignoracious Buttafucco but the time is almost here. Feisty Gazebo's ship comes over the horizon. There it is. Ignoracious Buttafucco's finger closes around the trigger loosely, causing the launcher to commence lock-on. A small repetitive beep turns into a single tone, signaling the moment for action. Ignoracious Buttafucco is surprised however as the rocket launches behind them instead of in front due to user error. This mistake would sting Ignoracious Buttafucco the most, if not for the tower of rocket fuel they have chosen as their location. Feisty Gazebo's ship rolls successfully by the towering pyre of incinerating flame, package still in tow.
09:00:43: Ignoracious Buttafucco does not normally mourn death. Ignoracious Buttafucco is accustomed to the loss of those they meet, in one capacity or another. But that last death. A split second of Ignoracious Buttafucco thinking about it meant they were a split second too late on the trigger as Feisty Gazebo emerged from the parking garage, package in tow. The shot missed. Feisty Gazebo dove, taking a shot mid-air. Feisty Gazebo was not thinking about human connection, unlike Ignoracious Buttafucco. This is arguably why Ignoracious Buttafucco was shot in the gut. Feisty Gazebo resumes their delivery, package in tow.
10:01:10: Blaylock Samson does not normally mourn death. Blaylock Samson is accustomed to the loss of those they meet, in one capacity or another. But that last death. A split second of Blaylock Samson thinking about it meant they were a split second too late on the trigger as Feisty Gazebo emerged from the parking garage, package in tow. The shot missed. Feisty Gazebo dove, taking a shot mid-air. Feisty Gazebo was not thinking about human connection, unlike Blaylock Samson. This is arguably why Blaylock Samson was shot in the gut. Feisty Gazebo resumes their delivery, package in tow.
11:00:33: Ignoracious Buttafucco is impaled on a lengthy spear with a laser tip by Feisty Gazebo after a failed package theft attempt. Feisty Gazebo resumes on their way.
12:00:33: Someone once told Mac Nielson that the best way to handle this job is if you keep it strictly business. Not personal. Do not concern yourself with revenge. Mac Nielson knows Feisty Gazebo has stolen one too many packages from them before, but brushes the sweat from their brow, banishing that memory. The heaviness of the EK40 surface to air missile launcher is starting to wear on Mac Nielson but the time is almost here. Feisty Gazebo's ship comes over the horizon. There it is. Mac Nielson's finger closes around the trigger loosely, causing the launcher to commence lock-on. A small repetitive beep turns into a single tone, signaling the moment for action. Mac Nielson is surprised however as the rocket launches behind them instead of in front due to user error. This mistake would sting Mac Nielson the most, if not for the tower of rocket fuel they have chosen as their location. Feisty Gazebo's ship rolls successfully by the towering pyre of incinerating flame, package still in tow.
13:00:31: Feisty Gazebo was running at break-neck speed and rounded a blind corner, stumbling upon a laser trip mine placed by Blaylock Samson. Luckily, Feisty Gazebo vaulted over it, only severing one foot. Feisty Gazebo resumes delivery with package in tow, albeit slightly hobbling.
14:00:30: Blaylock Samson tried to sneak on board Feisty Gazebo's ship but a security robot detected and repelled the attempt. Feisty Gazebo continues their delivery.
14:52:48: Package delivered by Feisty Gazebo for $200,000