03:03:28: Package picked up by Wulfrien Helgial
03:03:29: Someone once told @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) the best way to handle this job is like it's personal. Not business. @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) got one over on @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) once before. So definitely, for @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco), that advice hits close to the chest. No guns. Not this time. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) stakes out the area. Hides in the shadows. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) see's @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) running hurriedly down the street. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) takes one last look at the triple barrel sawed-off shotgun in their sling. Certainly safer. No. It's time for revenge. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) ducks out of the corner, an electrically charged knife in a firm grip. @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) doesn't even skip a beat, slicing downward with a chainsaw that @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) did not see before. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) takes a long horrified look at their severed limb on the ground, still clutching the knife, and then once more up to see @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) escaping with the package still in tow far down the road. Don't worry. The Intergalactic Postal Service has excellent health coverage for limb replacement.
04:01:11: Someone once told @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) the best way to handle this job is like it's personal. Not business. @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) got one over on @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) once before. So definitely, for @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson), that advice hits close to the chest. No guns. Not this time. @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) stakes out the area. Hides in the shadows. @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) see's @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) running hurriedly down the street. @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) takes one last look at the triple barrel sawed-off shotgun in their sling. Certainly safer. No. It's time for revenge. @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) ducks out of the corner, an electrically charged knife in a firm grip. @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) doesn't even skip a beat, slicing downward with a chainsaw that @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) did not see before. @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) takes a long horrified look at their severed limb on the ground, still clutching the knife, and then once more up to see @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) escaping with the package still in tow far down the road. Don't worry. The Intergalactic Postal Service has excellent health coverage for limb replacement.
05:01:09: @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) misses their double-fisted pistol shots. A sad attempt involving a total of 24 rounds fired at @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial). @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) resumes delivery of their package.
06:01:12: Someone once told @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) the best way to handle this job is like it's personal. Not business. @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) got one over on @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) once before. So definitely, for @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson), that advice hits close to the chest. No guns. Not this time. @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) stakes out the area. Hides in the shadows. @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) see's @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) running hurriedly down the street. @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) takes one last look at the triple barrel sawed-off shotgun in their sling. Certainly safer. No. It's time for revenge. @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) ducks out of the corner, an electrically charged knife in a firm grip. @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) doesn't even skip a beat, slicing downward with a chainsaw that @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) did not see before. @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) takes a long horrified look at their severed limb on the ground, still clutching the knife, and then once more up to see @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) escaping with the package still in tow far down the road. Don't worry. The Intergalactic Postal Service has excellent health coverage for limb replacement.
06:55:13: @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) was running at break-neck speed and rounded a blind corner, stumbling upon a laser trip mine placed by @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine). Luckily, @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) vaulted over it, only severing one foot. @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) resumes delivery with package in tow, albeit slightly hobbling.
06:55:19: @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) is impaled on a lengthy spear with a laser tip by @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) after a failed package theft attempt. @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) resumes on their way.
06:55:30: The wonderful thing about lasers, although expensive, is their ability to slice entirely through a surface and sever. @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) rounds a corner and only has a split second to see a blinding red light, before being decapitated by a slicingly accurate laser blast from @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine). The package rolls to their feet. "Parcel transferred." @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) resumes delivery of the stolen package.
07:01:50: Someone once told @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) the best way to handle this job is like it's personal. Not business. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) got one over on @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) once before. So definitely, for @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson), that advice hits close to the chest. No guns. Not this time. @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) stakes out the area. Hides in the shadows. @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) see's @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) running hurriedly down the street. @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) takes one last look at the triple barrel sawed-off shotgun in their sling. Certainly safer. No. It's time for revenge. @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) ducks out of the corner, an electrically charged knife in a firm grip. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) doesn't even skip a beat, slicing downward with a chainsaw that @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) did not see before. @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) takes a long horrified look at their severed limb on the ground, still clutching the knife, and then once more up to see @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) escaping with the package still in tow far down the road. Don't worry. The Intergalactic Postal Service has excellent health coverage for limb replacement.
08:00:56: @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) is impaled on a lengthy spear with a laser tip by @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) after a failed package theft attempt. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) resumes on their way.
09:00:12: Someone once told @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) the best way to handle this job is like it's personal. Not business. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) got one over on @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) once before. So definitely, for @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco), that advice hits close to the chest. No guns. Not this time. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) stakes out the area. Hides in the shadows. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) see's @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) running hurriedly down the street. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) takes one last look at the triple barrel sawed-off shotgun in their sling. Certainly safer. No. It's time for revenge. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) ducks out of the corner, an electrically charged knife in a firm grip. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) doesn't even skip a beat, slicing downward with a chainsaw that @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) did not see before. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) takes a long horrified look at their severed limb on the ground, still clutching the knife, and then once more up to see @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) escaping with the package still in tow far down the road. Don't worry. The Intergalactic Postal Service has excellent health coverage for limb replacement.
10:00:44: @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) misses their double-fisted pistol shots. A sad attempt involving a total of 24 rounds fired at @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine). @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) resumes delivery of their package.
11:01:02: @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) tried to sneak on board @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine)'s ship but a security robot detected and repelled the attempt. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) continues their delivery.
11:04:06: Package delivered by Leroy Palestine for $240,000