17:05:14: Package picked up by Cidmus Lexan
17:05:15: Today started as a uniquely bright one for @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco).  A wonderful breakfast.  "Have a great day at the service," and a kiss from their lover.  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) mused, "Why ruin a good thing?  I'll steal a package instead of being the idiot that always starts a delivery."  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) took their time, looking at the myriad of packages currently traversing the universe as well as the armaments at their disposal.  "Ah, that's the one.  I'm here already."  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) put on their favorite guilty pleasure of a song on an audio device, and hummed along, out of tune, as they laid down a multi-celled rocket launcher in the middle of the street on a hefty tripod.  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) crouched a fair distance away, readying their goggles and watching for @peepso_user_446(Cidmus Lexan) to come running down the road, package in tow.  "I know this one.  Never been able to handle their Zygerian Rum.  They won't be able to handle this either."  @peepso_user_446(Cidmus Lexan) came into view.  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) pushed the hand-held trigger mechanism.  Suddenly, the rocket launcher whirled on it's pivot, pointing at the abode @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) had just left.  "What?  How?"  As the rockets burnt the denizens inside to a crisp, @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) barely heard @peepso_user_446(Cidmus Lexan) running by shouting, "Always pack a signal disrupter, dickhead!"  @peepso_user_446(Cidmus Lexan) continued on without breaking a step, the package remaining in tow.
18:00:28: Someone once told @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) that the best way to handle this job is if you keep it strictly business.  Not personal.  Do not concern yourself with revenge.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) knows @peepso_user_446(Cidmus Lexan) has stolen one too many packages from them before, but brushes the sweat from their brow, banishing that memory.  The heaviness of the EK40 surface to air missile launcher is starting to wear on @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) but the time is almost here.  @peepso_user_446(Cidmus Lexan)'s ship comes over the horizon.  There it is. @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson)'s finger closes around the trigger loosely, causing the launcher to commence lock-on.  A small repetitive beep turns into a single tone, signaling the moment for action.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) is surprised however as the rocket launches behind them instead of in front due to user error.  This mistake would sting @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) the most, if not for the tower of rocket fuel they have chosen as their location.  @peepso_user_446(Cidmus Lexan)'s ship rolls successfully by the towering pyre of incinerating flame, package still in tow.
18:06:21: Package delivered by Cidmus Lexan for $40,000