21:29:07: Package picked up by Kane Cannon
21:29:08: @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) steadily took aim from a second story window as @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) ran by below. Sweat dotting their forehead, @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) inhaled sharply and squeezed the trigger. It was a miss. @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) resumes delivery, trying to ignore the echoing rifle shot and fragments of wall exploding just overhead.
21:38:43: @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) stumbles into their own trap: a hole dug in the ground full of Ixyotik Death Wasps meant to ensure @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon)'s destruction. Instead @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) resumes on their way, @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis)'s agonizing screams ringing in their ears.
21:39:01: There are automatic rifles and there are these. The GZNKA tank killer is surprisingly light as @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) hefts it on their shoulder. The rounds are known to puncture holes two feet wide through heavy ship armor, and are held in a backpack and fed via sling. It is this reason alone that @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) has used it, targeting @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon)'s ship as it races across the horizon. However, @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon)'s ship is not only retrofitted with two meter thick armor, but also an electronic shielding system. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis)'s rounds do find their way through the shields, but only make it one foot into the armor. @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) dips their ship, skirting past @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) and giving them third degree thruster burns across half of their body.
21:39:09: @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) has managed to somehow evade theft of the package thus far. @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) is feeling good. DAMN good. Unfortunately that feeling is momentarily suspended as a shot rings out, severing a cable holding up a net full of 700 pounds of refuse with a sign that has "Eat My Fuck - Cheers, @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis)" scrawled on it in pink paint. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) picks up the package which lies next to the mangled limbs of @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon). Fuck eaten. Good job, @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis). "Parcel Transferred." You have the package. Now get that sucker to the finish line.
21:44:14: @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) is bloody from head to toe after a rough number of successful entanglements. "Geronimo, fuckstick!" They look up at the voice and see a a dot in the sky. It quickly turns into two dots: a sky born @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) on a rocket powered hang-glider, and the portable thermonuclear device they've dropped. "Parcel transferred," can be heard from dispatch as @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) swoops past the mangled corpse and snags the package.
21:49:49: @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) is on a roll, carving a violent swathe through everything in their path when they enter a crossroads. Dangerous territory. A field of Space Bastards, but @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) smiles. Winners aren't born; they're built. @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) lets loose a volley of grenades while igniting their rocket boots, soaring over the carnage below. One failed attempt. Two. Three. Four. Each attempted theft of the package raises @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon)'s adrenaline. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) fires a wrist mounted laser, signing the hip of @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon). "Not today, my friend." @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) twists in mid-air and strafes the area with bullets, hitting @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) four times square in the torso and then resumes delivery.
21:49:57: @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) successfully spears @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) to a wall through their chest. @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) has time to yell, "You bastard," as @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) snags the package from the ground in front of them. "Parcel transferred."
21:55:46: @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) is impaled on a lengthy spear with a laser tip by @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) after a failed package theft attempt. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) resumes on their way.
22:00:40: @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) steadily took aim from a second story window as @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) ran by below. Sweat dotting their forehead, @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) inhaled sharply and squeezed the trigger. It was a miss. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) resumes delivery, trying to ignore the echoing rifle shot and fragments of wall exploding just overhead.
22:03:40: @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) steadily took aim from a second story window as @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) ran by below. Sweat dotting their forehead, @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) inhaled sharply and squeezed the trigger. It was a miss. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) resumes delivery, trying to ignore the echoing rifle shot and fragments of wall exploding just overhead.
22:09:59: @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) tried to sneak on board @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis)'s ship but a security robot detected and repelled the attempt. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) continues their delivery.
22:13:32: @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) bludgeons @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) unconscious with a large metal crowbar, laughing and dancing over their bloody mangled body. "Parcel transferred."
22:14:40: @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) takes two shotgun blasts directly to the spine from @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis), who continues on their way with the package. "Parcel transferred." @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) will be paying a deductible to get this fixed.
22:17:20: Today started as a uniquely bright one for @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon). A wonderful breakfast. "Have a great day at the service," and a kiss from their lover. @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) mused, "Why ruin a good thing? I'll steal a package instead of being the idiot that always starts a delivery." @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) took their time, looking at the myriad of packages currently traversing the universe as well as the armaments at their disposal. "Ah, that's the one. I'm here already." @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) put on their favorite guilty pleasure of a song on an audio device, and hummed along, out of tune, as they laid down a multi-celled rocket launcher in the middle of the street on a hefty tripod. @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) crouched a fair distance away, readying their goggles and watching for @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) to come running down the road, package in tow. "I know this one. Never been able to handle their Zygerian Rum. They won't be able to handle this either." @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) came into view. @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) pushed the hand-held trigger mechanism. Suddenly, the rocket launcher whirled on it's pivot, pointing at the abode @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) had just left. "What? How?" As the rockets burnt the denizens inside to a crisp, @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) barely heard @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) running by shouting, "Always pack a signal disrupter, dickhead!" @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) continued on without breaking a step, the package remaining in tow.
22:18:52: @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) does not normally mourn death. @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) is accustomed to the loss of those they meet, in one capacity or another. But that last death. A split second of @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) thinking about it meant they were a split second too late on the trigger as @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) emerged from the parking garage, package in tow. The shot missed. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) dove, taking a shot mid-air. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) was not thinking about human connection, unlike @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon). This is arguably why @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) was shot in the gut. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) resumes their delivery, package in tow.
22:19:42: Today started as a uniquely bright one for @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon). A wonderful breakfast. "Have a great day at the service," and a kiss from their lover. @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) mused, "Why ruin a good thing? I'll steal a package instead of being the idiot that always starts a delivery." @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) took their time, looking at the myriad of packages currently traversing the universe as well as the armaments at their disposal. "Ah, that's the one. I'm here already." @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) put on their favorite guilty pleasure of a song on an audio device, and hummed along, out of tune, as they laid down a multi-celled rocket launcher in the middle of the street on a hefty tripod. @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) crouched a fair distance away, readying their goggles and watching for @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) to come running down the road, package in tow. "I know this one. Never been able to handle their Zygerian Rum. They won't be able to handle this either." @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) came into view. @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) pushed the hand-held trigger mechanism. Suddenly, the rocket launcher whirled on it's pivot, pointing at the abode @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) had just left. "What? How?" As the rockets burnt the denizens inside to a crisp, @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) barely heard @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) running by shouting, "Always pack a signal disrupter, dickhead!" @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) continued on without breaking a step, the package remaining in tow.
22:19:54: The delivery point only has one way in, about a hundred yards away from a gated entry. @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) has taken the precaution of wrapping that entire entry-way with barbed wire. The only issue with barbed wire in this day and age is that once spotted, it can be avoided. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) ignites their rocket boots, attempting to vault over the death trap. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) almost makes it, but is caught on their ankles, immediately becoming a tangled bloody mess in @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon)'s trap. Frantic, @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) activates their shield generator which creates a kinetic field of energy around their body, and it successfully severs most of the barbed wire. Limping, @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) hustles towards the remainder of the delivery path, lobbing grenades over their shoulder. As @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) manically runs after @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) firing rounds in their direction, they are caught in one of @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis)'s grenades, losing a leg. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) continues, hobbling, towards the delivery point.
22:20:07: @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) is on a roll, carving a violent swathe through everything in their path when they enter a crossroads. Dangerous territory. A field of Space Bastards, but @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) smiles. Winners aren't born; they're built. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) lets loose a volley of grenades while igniting their rocket boots, soaring over the carnage below. One failed attempt. Two. Three. Four. Each attempted theft of the package raises @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis)'s adrenaline. @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) fires a wrist mounted laser, signing the hip of @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis). "Not today, my friend." @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) twists in mid-air and strafes the area with bullets, hitting @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) four times square in the torso and then resumes delivery.
22:20:17: Someone once told @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) that the best way to handle this job is if you keep it strictly business. Not personal. Do not concern yourself with revenge. @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) knows @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) has stolen one too many packages from them before, but brushes the sweat from their brow, banishing that memory. The heaviness of the EK40 surface to air missile launcher is starting to wear on @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) but the time is almost here. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis)'s ship comes over the horizon. There it is. @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon)'s finger closes around the trigger loosely, causing the launcher to commence lock-on. A small repetitive beep turns into a single tone, signaling the moment for action. @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) is surprised however as the rocket launches behind them instead of in front due to user error. This mistake would sting @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) the most, if not for the tower of rocket fuel they have chosen as their location. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis)'s ship rolls successfully by the towering pyre of incinerating flame, package still in tow.
22:20:25: @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) took a shortcut due to a fake sign placed by @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon), tripping over a portable road spike, and then landing in a field of Guruvian Nesters, an exotic species known for their sexual appetite. @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) currently has the package.
22:28:57: @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) shot a missile at @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) and obliterated their ship. All that was left was the package which was picked up and continued its journey with @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis).
22:29:02: @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) is impaled on a lengthy spear with a laser tip by @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) after a failed package theft attempt. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) resumes on their way.
22:29:04: @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon)'s ship rams head-first into @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis)'s ship, utilizing a superheated prow to disintegrate @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis)'s cockpit. The package is snagged by @peepso_user_91(Kane Cannon) after a daring space walk. "Parcel transferred."
22:29:09: Package delivered by Kane Cannon for $460,000