00:40:00: Package picked up by Buckaroo Banzai
00:40:01: Buckaroo Banzai was running at break-neck speed and rounded a blind corner, stumbling upon a laser trip mine placed by Blaylock Samson. Luckily, Buckaroo Banzai vaulted over it, only severing one foot. Buckaroo Banzai resumes delivery with package in tow, albeit slightly hobbling.
00:40:10: Someone once told Illiaen Abraxas the best way to handle this job is like it's personal. Not business. Buckaroo Banzai got one over on Illiaen Abraxas once before. So definitely, for Illiaen Abraxas, that advice hits close to the chest. No guns. Not this time. Illiaen Abraxas stakes out the area. Hides in the shadows. Illiaen Abraxas see's Buckaroo Banzai running hurriedly down the street. Illiaen Abraxas takes one last look at the triple barrel sawed-off shotgun in their sling. Certainly safer. No. It's time for revenge. Illiaen Abraxas ducks out of the corner, an electrically charged knife in a firm grip. Buckaroo Banzai doesn't even skip a beat, slicing downward with a chainsaw that Illiaen Abraxas did not see before. Illiaen Abraxas takes a long horrified look at their severed limb on the ground, still clutching the knife, and then once more up to see Buckaroo Banzai escaping with the package still in tow far down the road. Don't worry. The Intergalactic Postal Service has excellent health coverage for limb replacement.
00:42:49: The smell of Buckaroo Banzai's completely immolated ship flares up Illiaen Abraxas's nostrils as a tow cable yanks the package from the flaming wreck. "Parcel transferred" emit's from Illiaen Abraxas's bracelet, signaling more credits to be made. Illiaen Abraxas continues towards the delivery point, package in tow.
00:43:16: Calto Fremis steadily took aim from a second story window as Illiaen Abraxas ran by below. Sweat dotting their forehead, Calto Fremis inhaled sharply and squeezed the trigger. It was a miss. Illiaen Abraxas resumes delivery, trying to ignore the echoing rifle shot and fragments of wall exploding just overhead.
00:43:21: Someone once told Calto Fremis the best way to handle this job is like it's personal. Not business. Illiaen Abraxas got one over on Calto Fremis once before. So definitely, for Calto Fremis, that advice hits close to the chest. No guns. Not this time. Calto Fremis stakes out the area. Hides in the shadows. Calto Fremis see's Illiaen Abraxas running hurriedly down the street. Calto Fremis takes one last look at the triple barrel sawed-off shotgun in their sling. Certainly safer. No. It's time for revenge. Calto Fremis ducks out of the corner, an electrically charged knife in a firm grip. Illiaen Abraxas doesn't even skip a beat, slicing downward with a chainsaw that Calto Fremis did not see before. Calto Fremis takes a long horrified look at their severed limb on the ground, still clutching the knife, and then once more up to see Illiaen Abraxas escaping with the package still in tow far down the road. Don't worry. The Intergalactic Postal Service has excellent health coverage for limb replacement.
00:43:26: Illiaen Abraxas is on a roll, carving a violent swathe through everything in their path when they enter a crossroads. Dangerous territory. A field of Space Bastards, but Illiaen Abraxas smiles. Winners aren't born; they're built. Illiaen Abraxas lets loose a volley of grenades while igniting their rocket boots, soaring over the carnage below. One failed attempt. Two. Three. Four. Each attempted theft of the package raises Illiaen Abraxas's adrenaline. Calto Fremis fires a wrist mounted laser, signing the hip of Illiaen Abraxas. "Not today, my friend." Illiaen Abraxas twists in mid-air and strafes the area with bullets, hitting Calto Fremis four times square in the torso and then resumes delivery.
00:43:34: Illiaen Abraxas has managed to somehow evade theft of the package thus far. Illiaen Abraxas is feeling good. DAMN good. Unfortunately that feeling is momentarily suspended as a shot rings out, severing a cable holding up a net full of 700 pounds of refuse with a sign that has "Eat My Fuck - Cheers, Calto Fremis" scrawled on it in pink paint. Calto Fremis picks up the package which lies next to the mangled limbs of Illiaen Abraxas. Fuck eaten. Good job, Calto Fremis. "Parcel Transferred." You have the package. Now get that sucker to the finish line.
01:27:51: Calto Fremis was running at break-neck speed and rounded a blind corner, stumbling upon a laser trip mine placed by Column McClowed. Luckily, Calto Fremis vaulted over it, only severing one foot. Calto Fremis resumes delivery with package in tow, albeit slightly hobbling.
01:28:10: Calto Fremis is on a roll, carving a violent swathe through everything in their path when they enter a crossroads. Dangerous territory. A field of Space Bastards, but Calto Fremis smiles. Winners aren't born; they're built. Calto Fremis lets loose a volley of grenades while igniting their rocket boots, soaring over the carnage below. One failed attempt. Two. Three. Four. Each attempted theft of the package raises Calto Fremis's adrenaline. Column McClowed fires a wrist mounted laser, signing the hip of Calto Fremis. "Not today, my friend." Calto Fremis twists in mid-air and strafes the area with bullets, hitting Column McClowed four times square in the torso and then resumes delivery.
01:28:21: Calto Fremis took a shortcut due to a fake sign placed by Column McClowed, tripping over a portable road spike, and then landing in a field of Guruvian Nesters, an exotic species known for their sexual appetite. Column McClowed currently has the package.
01:35:19: Column McClowed was feeling THAT feeling. The feeling of the win just over the horizon. A smile crept across Column McClowed's face, thinking of exactly what they would use these credits to purchase, when Calto Fremis launched an electrified bola at their feet. Column McClowed can't quite internalize that the most painful step is also the most confident, as a dart is lodged into their neck before Column McClowed's head even hits the ground, bringing on many hours of sleep. Calto Fremis smiles as their delivery bracelet emits the familiar "Parcel transferred" message.
01:36:47: Calto Fremis was running at break-neck speed and rounded a blind corner, stumbling upon a laser trip mine placed by Column McClowed. Luckily, Calto Fremis vaulted over it, only severing one foot. Calto Fremis resumes delivery with package in tow, albeit slightly hobbling.
01:36:52: Calto Fremis was feeling THAT feeling. The feeling of the win just over the horizon. A smile crept across Calto Fremis's face, thinking of exactly what they would use these credits to purchase, when Column McClowed launched an electrified bola at their feet. Calto Fremis can't quite internalize that the most painful step is also the most confident, as a dart is lodged into their neck before Calto Fremis's head even hits the ground, bringing on many hours of sleep. Column McClowed smiles as their delivery bracelet emits the familiar "Parcel transferred" message.
01:40:01: Package delivered by Column McClowed for $260,000