03:12:00: Package picked up by Sable Nyx (Shayla225)
03:12:01: Today started as a uniquely bright one for Ignoracious Buttafucco (npc2).  A wonderful breakfast.  "Have a great day at the service," and a kiss from their lover.  Ignoracious Buttafucco (npc2) mused, "Why ruin a good thing?  I'll steal a package instead of being the idiot that always starts a delivery."  Ignoracious Buttafucco (npc2) took their time, looking at the myriad of packages currently traversing the universe as well as the armaments at their disposal.  "Ah, that's the one.  I'm here already."  Ignoracious Buttafucco (npc2) put on their favorite guilty pleasure of a song on an audio device, and hummed along, out of tune, as they laid down a multi-celled rocket launcher in the middle of the street on a hefty tripod.  Ignoracious Buttafucco (npc2) crouched a fair distance away, readying their goggles and watching for Sable Nyx (Shayla225) to come running down the road, package in tow.  "I know this one.  Never been able to handle their Zygerian Rum.  They won't be able to handle this either."  Sable Nyx (Shayla225) came into view.  Ignoracious Buttafucco (npc2) pushed the hand-held trigger mechanism.  Suddenly, the rocket launcher whirled on it's pivot, pointing at the abode Ignoracious Buttafucco (npc2) had just left.  "What?  How?"  As the rockets burnt the denizens inside to a crisp, Ignoracious Buttafucco (npc2) barely heard Sable Nyx (Shayla225) running by shouting, "Always pack a signal disrupter, dickhead!"  Sable Nyx (Shayla225) continued on without breaking a step, the package remaining in tow.
05:29:47: Today started as a uniquely bright one for Leroy Palestine (leroypalestine).  A wonderful breakfast.  "Have a great day at the service," and a kiss from their lover.  Leroy Palestine (leroypalestine) mused, "Why ruin a good thing?  I'll steal a package instead of being the idiot that always starts a delivery."  Leroy Palestine (leroypalestine) took their time, looking at the myriad of packages currently traversing the universe as well as the armaments at their disposal.  "Ah, that's the one.  I'm here already."  Leroy Palestine (leroypalestine) put on their favorite guilty pleasure of a song on an audio device, and hummed along, out of tune, as they laid down a multi-celled rocket launcher in the middle of the street on a hefty tripod.  Leroy Palestine (leroypalestine) crouched a fair distance away, readying their goggles and watching for Sable Nyx (Shayla225) to come running down the road, package in tow.  "I know this one.  Never been able to handle their Zygerian Rum.  They won't be able to handle this either."  Sable Nyx (Shayla225) came into view.  Leroy Palestine (leroypalestine) pushed the hand-held trigger mechanism.  Suddenly, the rocket launcher whirled on it's pivot, pointing at the abode Leroy Palestine (leroypalestine) had just left.  "What?  How?"  As the rockets burnt the denizens inside to a crisp, Leroy Palestine (leroypalestine) barely heard Sable Nyx (Shayla225) running by shouting, "Always pack a signal disrupter, dickhead!"  Sable Nyx (Shayla225) continued on without breaking a step, the package remaining in tow.
05:30:01: Leroy Palestine (leroypalestine) steadily took aim from a second story window as Sable Nyx (Shayla225) ran by below.  Sweat dotting their forehead, Leroy Palestine (leroypalestine) inhaled sharply and squeezed the trigger.  It was a miss.  Sable Nyx (Shayla225) resumes delivery, trying to ignore the echoing rifle shot and fragments of wall exploding just overhead.
05:30:17: Sable Nyx (Shayla225) leaps off of a second story building on to a tall dumpster, shortening the fall.  Unfortunately this dumpster is full of explosives placed by Leroy Palestine (leroypalestine).  Leroy Palestine (leroypalestine) smiles as they plunge their thumb onto the detonator switch, their face ignited by a pillar of flames as Sable Nyx (Shayla225) is incinerated.  Leroy Palestine (leroypalestine) throws the detonator over their shoulder as they pick up the package that rolls to their feet as if it was meant for them.  Leroy Palestine (leroypalestine) breaks into a fast run, taking the stolen package with them.  "Parcel transferred," emits from their delivery bracelet signifying even more credits to be earned.  "Parcel transferred, indeed," Leroy Palestine (leroypalestine) whispers in reply.
14:13:05: Package delivered by Leroy Palestine for $80,000