00:08:24: Package picked up by Leroy Palestine
00:08:25: Today started as a uniquely bright one for @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson).  A wonderful breakfast.  "Have a great day at the service," and a kiss from their lover.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) mused, "Why ruin a good thing?  I'll steal a package instead of being the idiot that always starts a delivery."  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) took their time, looking at the myriad of packages currently traversing the universe as well as the armaments at their disposal.  "Ah, that's the one.  I'm here already."  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) put on their favorite guilty pleasure of a song on an audio device, and hummed along, out of tune, as they laid down a multi-celled rocket launcher in the middle of the street on a hefty tripod.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) crouched a fair distance away, readying their goggles and watching for @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) to come running down the road, package in tow.  "I know this one.  Never been able to handle their Zygerian Rum.  They won't be able to handle this either."  @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) came into view.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) pushed the hand-held trigger mechanism.  Suddenly, the rocket launcher whirled on it's pivot, pointing at the abode @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) had just left.  "What?  How?"  As the rockets burnt the denizens inside to a crisp, @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) barely heard @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) running by shouting, "Always pack a signal disrupter, dickhead!"  @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) continued on without breaking a step, the package remaining in tow.
01:07:43: @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) is impaled on a lengthy spear with a laser tip by @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) after a failed package theft attempt.  @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) resumes on their way.
02:00:48: @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) misses their double-fisted pistol shots.   A sad attempt involving a total of 24 rounds fired at @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine).  @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) resumes delivery of their package.
03:02:24: Today started as a uniquely bright one for @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco).  A wonderful breakfast.  "Have a great day at the service," and a kiss from their lover.  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) mused, "Why ruin a good thing?  I'll steal a package instead of being the idiot that always starts a delivery."  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) took their time, looking at the myriad of packages currently traversing the universe as well as the armaments at their disposal.  "Ah, that's the one.  I'm here already."  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) put on their favorite guilty pleasure of a song on an audio device, and hummed along, out of tune, as they laid down a multi-celled rocket launcher in the middle of the street on a hefty tripod.  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) crouched a fair distance away, readying their goggles and watching for @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) to come running down the road, package in tow.  "I know this one.  Never been able to handle their Zygerian Rum.  They won't be able to handle this either."  @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) came into view.  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) pushed the hand-held trigger mechanism.  Suddenly, the rocket launcher whirled on it's pivot, pointing at the abode @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) had just left.  "What?  How?"  As the rockets burnt the denizens inside to a crisp, @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) barely heard @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) running by shouting, "Always pack a signal disrupter, dickhead!"  @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) continued on without breaking a step, the package remaining in tow.
04:07:56: @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) does not normally mourn death.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) is accustomed to the loss of those they meet, in one capacity or another.  But that last death.  A split second of @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) thinking about it meant they were a split second too late on the trigger as @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) emerged from the parking garage, package in tow.  The shot missed.  @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) dove, taking a shot mid-air.  @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) was not thinking about human connection, unlike @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson).  This is arguably why @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) was shot in the gut.  @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) resumes their delivery, package in tow.
05:03:41: @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) does not normally mourn death.  @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) is accustomed to the loss of those they meet, in one capacity or another.  But that last death.  A split second of @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) thinking about it meant they were a split second too late on the trigger as @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) emerged from the parking garage, package in tow.  The shot missed.  @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) dove, taking a shot mid-air.  @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) was not thinking about human connection, unlike @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson).  This is arguably why @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) was shot in the gut.  @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) resumes their delivery, package in tow.
06:01:31: @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) is impaled on a lengthy spear with a laser tip by @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) after a failed package theft attempt.  @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) resumes on their way.
07:07:06: @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) does not normally mourn death.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) is accustomed to the loss of those they meet, in one capacity or another.  But that last death.  A split second of @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) thinking about it meant they were a split second too late on the trigger as @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) emerged from the parking garage, package in tow.  The shot missed.  @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) dove, taking a shot mid-air.  @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) was not thinking about human connection, unlike @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson).  This is arguably why @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) was shot in the gut.  @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) resumes their delivery, package in tow.
08:23:43: Package delivered by Leroy Palestine for $160,000