01:01:39: Package picked up by Wulfrien Helgial
01:01:40: Someone once told @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) the best way to handle this job is like it's personal.  Not business.  @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) got one over on @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) once before.  So definitely, for @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson), that advice hits close to the chest.  No guns.  Not this time.  @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) stakes out the area.  Hides in the shadows.  @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) see's @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) running hurriedly down the street.  @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) takes one last look at the triple barrel sawed-off shotgun in their sling.  Certainly safer.  No.  It's time for revenge.  @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) ducks out of the corner, an electrically charged knife in a firm grip.  @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) doesn't even skip a beat, slicing downward with a chainsaw that @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) did not see before.  @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) takes a long horrified look at their severed limb on the ground, still clutching the knife, and then once more up to see @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) escaping with the package still in tow far down the road.  Don't worry.  The Intergalactic Postal Service has excellent health coverage for limb replacement.
02:01:13: @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) stumbles into their own trap:  a hole dug in the ground full of Ixyotik Death Wasps meant to ensure @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial)'s destruction.  Instead @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) resumes on their way, @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco)'s agonizing screams ringing in their ears.
03:00:56: @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) misses their double-fisted pistol shots.   A sad attempt involving a total of 24 rounds fired at @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial).  @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) resumes delivery of their package.
04:01:04: Someone once told @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) the best way to handle this job is like it's personal.  Not business.  @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) got one over on @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) once before.  So definitely, for @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson), that advice hits close to the chest.  No guns.  Not this time.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) stakes out the area.  Hides in the shadows.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) see's @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) running hurriedly down the street.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) takes one last look at the triple barrel sawed-off shotgun in their sling.  Certainly safer.  No.  It's time for revenge.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) ducks out of the corner, an electrically charged knife in a firm grip.  @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) doesn't even skip a beat, slicing downward with a chainsaw that @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) did not see before.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) takes a long horrified look at their severed limb on the ground, still clutching the knife, and then once more up to see @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) escaping with the package still in tow far down the road.  Don't worry.  The Intergalactic Postal Service has excellent health coverage for limb replacement.
05:00:37: @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) stumbles into their own trap:  a hole dug in the ground full of Ixyotik Death Wasps meant to ensure @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial)'s destruction.  Instead @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) resumes on their way, @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson)'s agonizing screams ringing in their ears.
06:09:59: Today started as a uniquely bright one for @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson).  A wonderful breakfast.  "Have a great day at the service," and a kiss from their lover.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) mused, "Why ruin a good thing?  I'll steal a package instead of being the idiot that always starts a delivery."  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) took their time, looking at the myriad of packages currently traversing the universe as well as the armaments at their disposal.  "Ah, that's the one.  I'm here already."  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) put on their favorite guilty pleasure of a song on an audio device, and hummed along, out of tune, as they laid down a multi-celled rocket launcher in the middle of the street on a hefty tripod.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) crouched a fair distance away, readying their goggles and watching for @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) to come running down the road, package in tow.  "I know this one.  Never been able to handle their Zygerian Rum.  They won't be able to handle this either."  @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) came into view.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) pushed the hand-held trigger mechanism.  Suddenly, the rocket launcher whirled on it's pivot, pointing at the abode @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) had just left.  "What?  How?"  As the rockets burnt the denizens inside to a crisp, @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) barely heard @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) running by shouting, "Always pack a signal disrupter, dickhead!"  @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) continued on without breaking a step, the package remaining in tow.
07:02:42: @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) does not normally mourn death.  @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) is accustomed to the loss of those they meet, in one capacity or another.  But that last death.  A split second of @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) thinking about it meant they were a split second too late on the trigger as @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) emerged from the parking garage, package in tow.  The shot missed.  @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) dove, taking a shot mid-air.  @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) was not thinking about human connection, unlike @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson).  This is arguably why @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) was shot in the gut.  @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) resumes their delivery, package in tow.
08:03:15: @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) is on a roll, carving a violent swathe through everything in their path when they enter a crossroads.  Dangerous territory.  A field of Space Bastards, but @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) smiles.  Winners aren't born; they're built.  @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) lets loose a volley of grenades while igniting their rocket boots, soaring over the carnage below.  One failed attempt.  Two.  Three.  Four.  Each attempted theft of the package raises @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial)'s adrenaline.  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) fires a wrist mounted laser, signing the hip of @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial).  "Not today, my friend."  @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) twists in mid-air and strafes the area with bullets, hitting @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) four times square in the torso and then resumes delivery.
09:00:06: @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) does not normally mourn death.  @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) is accustomed to the loss of those they meet, in one capacity or another.  But that last death.  A split second of @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) thinking about it meant they were a split second too late on the trigger as @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) emerged from the parking garage, package in tow.  The shot missed.  @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) dove, taking a shot mid-air.  @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) was not thinking about human connection, unlike @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson).  This is arguably why @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) was shot in the gut.  @peepso_user_295(Wulfrien Helgial) resumes their delivery, package in tow.
09:03:34: Package delivered by Wulfrien Helgial for $180,000