07:40:30: Package picked up by Tharg The Mighty One
07:40:31: @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) was running at break-neck speed and rounded a blind corner, stumbling upon a laser trip mine placed by @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson).  Luckily, @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) vaulted over it, only severing one foot.  @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) resumes delivery with package in tow, albeit slightly hobbling.
08:00:18: Someone once told @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) the best way to handle this job is like it's personal.  Not business.  @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) got one over on @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) once before.  So definitely, for @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco), that advice hits close to the chest.  No guns.  Not this time.  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) stakes out the area.  Hides in the shadows.  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) see's @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) running hurriedly down the street.  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) takes one last look at the triple barrel sawed-off shotgun in their sling.  Certainly safer.  No.  It's time for revenge.  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) ducks out of the corner, an electrically charged knife in a firm grip.  @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) doesn't even skip a beat, slicing downward with a chainsaw that @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) did not see before.  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) takes a long horrified look at their severed limb on the ground, still clutching the knife, and then once more up to see @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) escaping with the package still in tow far down the road.  Don't worry.  The Intergalactic Postal Service has excellent health coverage for limb replacement.
09:00:19: Today started as a uniquely bright one for @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco).  A wonderful breakfast.  "Have a great day at the service," and a kiss from their lover.  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) mused, "Why ruin a good thing?  I'll steal a package instead of being the idiot that always starts a delivery."  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) took their time, looking at the myriad of packages currently traversing the universe as well as the armaments at their disposal.  "Ah, that's the one.  I'm here already."  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) put on their favorite guilty pleasure of a song on an audio device, and hummed along, out of tune, as they laid down a multi-celled rocket launcher in the middle of the street on a hefty tripod.  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) crouched a fair distance away, readying their goggles and watching for @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) to come running down the road, package in tow.  "I know this one.  Never been able to handle their Zygerian Rum.  They won't be able to handle this either."  @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) came into view.  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) pushed the hand-held trigger mechanism.  Suddenly, the rocket launcher whirled on it's pivot, pointing at the abode @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) had just left.  "What?  How?"  As the rockets burnt the denizens inside to a crisp, @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) barely heard @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) running by shouting, "Always pack a signal disrupter, dickhead!"  @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) continued on without breaking a step, the package remaining in tow.
10:00:20: @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) tried to sneak on board @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One)'s ship but a security robot detected and repelled the attempt.  @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) continues their delivery.
11:00:21: @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) misses their double-fisted pistol shots.   A sad attempt involving a total of 24 rounds fired at @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One).  @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) resumes delivery of their package.
12:00:22: @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) does not normally mourn death.  @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) is accustomed to the loss of those they meet, in one capacity or another.  But that last death.  A split second of @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) thinking about it meant they were a split second too late on the trigger as @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) emerged from the parking garage, package in tow.  The shot missed.  @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) dove, taking a shot mid-air.  @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) was not thinking about human connection, unlike @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson).  This is arguably why @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) was shot in the gut.  @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) resumes their delivery, package in tow.
13:00:23: @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) does not normally mourn death.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) is accustomed to the loss of those they meet, in one capacity or another.  But that last death.  A split second of @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) thinking about it meant they were a split second too late on the trigger as @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) emerged from the parking garage, package in tow.  The shot missed.  @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) dove, taking a shot mid-air.  @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) was not thinking about human connection, unlike @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson).  This is arguably why @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) was shot in the gut.  @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) resumes their delivery, package in tow.
14:00:20: There are automatic rifles and there are these.  The GZNKA tank killer is surprisingly light as @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) hefts it on their shoulder.  The rounds are known to puncture holes two feet wide through heavy ship armor, and are held in a backpack and fed via sling.  It is this reason alone that @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) has used it, targeting @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One)'s ship as it races across the horizon.  However, @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One)'s ship is not only retrofitted with two meter thick armor, but also an electronic shielding system.  @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson)'s rounds do find their way through the shields, but only make it one foot into the armor.  @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) dips their ship, skirting past @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) and giving them third degree thruster burns across half of their body.
15:00:23: The delivery point only has one way in, about a hundred yards away from a gated entry.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) has taken the precaution of wrapping that entire entry-way with barbed wire.  The only issue with barbed wire in this day and age is that once spotted, it can be avoided.  @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) ignites their rocket boots, attempting to vault over the death trap.  @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) almost makes it, but is caught on their ankles, immediately becoming a tangled bloody mess in @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson)'s trap. Frantic, @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) activates their shield generator which creates a kinetic field of energy around their body, and it successfully severs most of the barbed wire.  Limping, @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) hustles towards the remainder of the delivery path, lobbing grenades over their shoulder.  As @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) manically runs after @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) firing rounds in their direction, they are caught in one of @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One)'s grenades, losing a leg.  @peepso_user_134(Tharg The Mighty One) continues, hobbling, towards the delivery point.
15:41:26: Package delivered by Tharg The Mighty One for $180,000