04:03:17: Package picked up by Buckaroo Banzai
04:03:18: Buckaroo Banzai was running at break-neck speed and rounded a blind corner, stumbling upon a laser trip mine placed by Blaylock Samson. Luckily, Buckaroo Banzai vaulted over it, only severing one foot. Buckaroo Banzai resumes delivery with package in tow, albeit slightly hobbling.
04:12:32: Buckaroo Banzai is riddled with repetitive machine gun fire from Leroy Palestine, falling to their knees and letting the package slip from their fingers. "Parcel transferred." Leroy Palestine resumes delivery with the package.
04:27:14: Leroy Palestine was running at break-neck speed and rounded a blind corner, stumbling upon a laser trip mine placed by Harrison Ware. Luckily, Leroy Palestine vaulted over it, only severing one foot. Leroy Palestine resumes delivery with package in tow, albeit slightly hobbling.
04:27:44: Today started as a uniquely bright one for Harrison Ware. A wonderful breakfast. "Have a great day at the service," and a kiss from their lover. Harrison Ware mused, "Why ruin a good thing? I'll steal a package instead of being the idiot that always starts a delivery." Harrison Ware took their time, looking at the myriad of packages currently traversing the universe as well as the armaments at their disposal. "Ah, that's the one. I'm here already." Harrison Ware put on their favorite guilty pleasure of a song on an audio device, and hummed along, out of tune, as they laid down a multi-celled rocket launcher in the middle of the street on a hefty tripod. Harrison Ware crouched a fair distance away, readying their goggles and watching for Leroy Palestine to come running down the road, package in tow. "I know this one. Never been able to handle their Zygerian Rum. They won't be able to handle this either." Leroy Palestine came into view. Harrison Ware pushed the hand-held trigger mechanism. Suddenly, the rocket launcher whirled on it's pivot, pointing at the abode Harrison Ware had just left. "What? How?" As the rockets burnt the denizens inside to a crisp, Harrison Ware barely heard Leroy Palestine running by shouting, "Always pack a signal disrupter, dickhead!" Leroy Palestine continued on without breaking a step, the package remaining in tow.
04:27:56: Leroy Palestine is on a roll, carving a violent swathe through everything in their path when they enter a crossroads. Dangerous territory. A field of Space Bastards, but Leroy Palestine smiles. Winners aren't born; they're built. Leroy Palestine lets loose a volley of grenades while igniting their rocket boots, soaring over the carnage below. One failed attempt. Two. Three. Four. Each attempted theft of the package raises Leroy Palestine's adrenaline. Harrison Ware fires a wrist mounted laser, signing the hip of Leroy Palestine. "Not today, my friend." Leroy Palestine twists in mid-air and strafes the area with bullets, hitting Harrison Ware four times square in the torso and then resumes delivery.
04:28:07: Leroy Palestine is riddled with repetitive machine gun fire from Harrison Ware, falling to their knees and letting the package slip from their fingers. "Parcel transferred." Harrison Ware resumes delivery with the package.
05:09:31: Package delivered by Harrison Ware for $120,000