21:16:08: Package picked up by Shadowrabbit Clayguy
21:16:09: @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) steadily took aim from a second story window as @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) ran by below.  Sweat dotting their forehead, @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) inhaled sharply and squeezed the trigger.  It was a miss.  @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) resumes delivery, trying to ignore the echoing rifle shot and fragments of wall exploding just overhead.
21:58:57: @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) has been sucked into a portable black hole shot from @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine)'s MSK-8500 rifle, not only losing the package to @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine), but flung to unknown reaches of the universe.  "Parcel transferred."
22:00:40: @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) is on a roll, carving a violent swathe through everything in their path when they enter a crossroads.  Dangerous territory.  A field of Space Bastards, but @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) smiles.  Winners aren't born; they're built.  @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) lets loose a volley of grenades while igniting their rocket boots, soaring over the carnage below.  One failed attempt.  Two.  Three.  Four.  Each attempted theft of the package raises @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine)'s adrenaline.  @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) fires a wrist mounted laser, signing the hip of @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine).  "Not today, my friend."  @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) twists in mid-air and strafes the area with bullets, hitting @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) four times square in the torso and then resumes delivery.
22:14:59: @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) is riddled with repetitive machine gun fire from @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy), falling to their knees and letting the package slip from their fingers.  "Parcel transferred."  @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) resumes delivery with the package.
22:35:29: @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) is bloody from head to toe after a rough number of successful entanglements.  "Geronimo, fuckstick!"  They look up at the voice and see a a dot in the sky.  It quickly turns into two dots:  a sky born @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) on a rocket powered hang-glider, and the portable thermonuclear device they've dropped.  "Parcel transferred," can be heard from dispatch as @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) swoops past the mangled corpse and snags the package.
23:01:07: Someone once told @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) the best way to handle this job is like it's personal.  Not business.  @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) got one over on @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) once before.  So definitely, for @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson), that advice hits close to the chest.  No guns.  Not this time.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) stakes out the area.  Hides in the shadows.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) see's @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) running hurriedly down the street.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) takes one last look at the triple barrel sawed-off shotgun in their sling.  Certainly safer.  No.  It's time for revenge.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) ducks out of the corner, an electrically charged knife in a firm grip.  @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) doesn't even skip a beat, slicing downward with a chainsaw that @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) did not see before.  @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) takes a long horrified look at their severed limb on the ground, still clutching the knife, and then once more up to see @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) escaping with the package still in tow far down the road.  Don't worry.  The Intergalactic Postal Service has excellent health coverage for limb replacement.
23:11:50: @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) leaps off of a second story building on to a tall dumpster, shortening the fall.  Unfortunately this dumpster is full of explosives placed by @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy).  @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) smiles as they plunge their thumb onto the detonator switch, their face ignited by a pillar of flames as @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) is incinerated.  @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) throws the detonator over their shoulder as they pick up the package that rolls to their feet as if it was meant for them.  @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) breaks into a fast run, taking the stolen package with them.  "Parcel transferred," emits from their delivery bracelet signifying even more credits to be earned.  "Parcel transferred, indeed," @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) whispers in reply.
05:17:06: Package delivered by Shadowrabbit Clayguy for $140,000