13:04:01: Package picked up by Cleve Dallas
13:04:02: @peepso_user_336(Cleve Dallas) is on a roll, carving a violent swathe through everything in their path when they enter a crossroads. Dangerous territory. A field of Space Bastards, but @peepso_user_336(Cleve Dallas) smiles. Winners aren't born; they're built. @peepso_user_336(Cleve Dallas) lets loose a volley of grenades while igniting their rocket boots, soaring over the carnage below. One failed attempt. Two. Three. Four. Each attempted theft of the package raises @peepso_user_336(Cleve Dallas)'s adrenaline. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) fires a wrist mounted laser, signing the hip of @peepso_user_336(Cleve Dallas). "Not today, my friend." @peepso_user_336(Cleve Dallas) twists in mid-air and strafes the area with bullets, hitting @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) four times square in the torso and then resumes delivery.
14:01:12: @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) tried to sneak on board @peepso_user_336(Cleve Dallas)'s ship but a security robot detected and repelled the attempt. @peepso_user_336(Cleve Dallas) continues their delivery.
15:00:51: There are automatic rifles and there are these. The GZNKA tank killer is surprisingly light as @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) hefts it on their shoulder. The rounds are known to puncture holes two feet wide through heavy ship armor, and are held in a backpack and fed via sling. It is this reason alone that @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) has used it, targeting @peepso_user_336(Cleve Dallas)'s ship as it races across the horizon. However, @peepso_user_336(Cleve Dallas)'s ship is not only retrofitted with two meter thick armor, but also an electronic shielding system. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco)'s rounds do find their way through the shields, but only make it one foot into the armor. @peepso_user_336(Cleve Dallas) dips their ship, skirting past @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) and giving them third degree thruster burns across half of their body.
16:00:05: Today started as a uniquely bright one for @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco). A wonderful breakfast. "Have a great day at the service," and a kiss from their lover. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) mused, "Why ruin a good thing? I'll steal a package instead of being the idiot that always starts a delivery." @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) took their time, looking at the myriad of packages currently traversing the universe as well as the armaments at their disposal. "Ah, that's the one. I'm here already." @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) put on their favorite guilty pleasure of a song on an audio device, and hummed along, out of tune, as they laid down a multi-celled rocket launcher in the middle of the street on a hefty tripod. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) crouched a fair distance away, readying their goggles and watching for @peepso_user_336(Cleve Dallas) to come running down the road, package in tow. "I know this one. Never been able to handle their Zygerian Rum. They won't be able to handle this either." @peepso_user_336(Cleve Dallas) came into view. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) pushed the hand-held trigger mechanism. Suddenly, the rocket launcher whirled on it's pivot, pointing at the abode @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) had just left. "What? How?" As the rockets burnt the denizens inside to a crisp, @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) barely heard @peepso_user_336(Cleve Dallas) running by shouting, "Always pack a signal disrupter, dickhead!" @peepso_user_336(Cleve Dallas) continued on without breaking a step, the package remaining in tow.
17:00:37: @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) is impaled on a lengthy spear with a laser tip by @peepso_user_336(Cleve Dallas) after a failed package theft attempt. @peepso_user_336(Cleve Dallas) resumes on their way.
17:57:39: @peepso_user_336(Cleve Dallas) is bloody from head to toe after a rough number of successful entanglements. "Geronimo, fuckstick!" They look up at the voice and see a a dot in the sky. It quickly turns into two dots: a sky born @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) on a rocket powered hang-glider, and the portable thermonuclear device they've dropped. "Parcel transferred," can be heard from dispatch as @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) swoops past the mangled corpse and snags the package.
18:00:47: @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) stumbles into their own trap: a hole dug in the ground full of Ixyotik Death Wasps meant to ensure @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy)'s destruction. Instead @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) resumes on their way, @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson)'s agonizing screams ringing in their ears.
18:00:48: @peepso_user_336(Cleve Dallas) does not normally mourn death. @peepso_user_336(Cleve Dallas) is accustomed to the loss of those they meet, in one capacity or another. But that last death. A split second of @peepso_user_336(Cleve Dallas) thinking about it meant they were a split second too late on the trigger as @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) emerged from the parking garage, package in tow. The shot missed. @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) dove, taking a shot mid-air. @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) was not thinking about human connection, unlike @peepso_user_336(Cleve Dallas). This is arguably why @peepso_user_336(Cleve Dallas) was shot in the gut. @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) resumes their delivery, package in tow.
19:00:38: @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) misses their double-fisted pistol shots. A sad attempt involving a total of 24 rounds fired at @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy). @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) resumes delivery of their package.
20:01:02: @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) steadily took aim from a second story window as @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) ran by below. Sweat dotting their forehead, @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) inhaled sharply and squeezed the trigger. It was a miss. @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) resumes delivery, trying to ignore the echoing rifle shot and fragments of wall exploding just overhead.
20:21:23: @peepso_user_322(Shadowrabbit Clayguy) is riddled with repetitive machine gun fire from @peepso_user_221(O.D. Bodkins), falling to their knees and letting the package slip from their fingers. "Parcel transferred." @peepso_user_221(O.D. Bodkins) resumes delivery with the package.
21:01:08: Someone once told @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) that the best way to handle this job is if you keep it strictly business. Not personal. Do not concern yourself with revenge. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) knows @peepso_user_221(O.D. Bodkins) has stolen one too many packages from them before, but brushes the sweat from their brow, banishing that memory. The heaviness of the EK40 surface to air missile launcher is starting to wear on @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) but the time is almost here. @peepso_user_221(O.D. Bodkins)'s ship comes over the horizon. There it is. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco)'s finger closes around the trigger loosely, causing the launcher to commence lock-on. A small repetitive beep turns into a single tone, signaling the moment for action. @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) is surprised however as the rocket launches behind them instead of in front due to user error. This mistake would sting @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) the most, if not for the tower of rocket fuel they have chosen as their location. @peepso_user_221(O.D. Bodkins)'s ship rolls successfully by the towering pyre of incinerating flame, package still in tow.
21:05:03: Package delivered by O.D. Bodkins for $240,000