10:04:51: Package picked up by Calto Fremis
10:04:52: @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) tried to sneak on board @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis)'s ship but a security robot detected and repelled the attempt. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) continues their delivery.
13:00:28: @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco) tried to sneak on board @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis)'s ship but a security robot detected and repelled the attempt. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) continues their delivery.
14:00:20: Today started as a uniquely bright one for @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson). A wonderful breakfast. "Have a great day at the service," and a kiss from their lover. @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) mused, "Why ruin a good thing? I'll steal a package instead of being the idiot that always starts a delivery." @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) took their time, looking at the myriad of packages currently traversing the universe as well as the armaments at their disposal. "Ah, that's the one. I'm here already." @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) put on their favorite guilty pleasure of a song on an audio device, and hummed along, out of tune, as they laid down a multi-celled rocket launcher in the middle of the street on a hefty tripod. @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) crouched a fair distance away, readying their goggles and watching for @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) to come running down the road, package in tow. "I know this one. Never been able to handle their Zygerian Rum. They won't be able to handle this either." @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) came into view. @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) pushed the hand-held trigger mechanism. Suddenly, the rocket launcher whirled on it's pivot, pointing at the abode @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) had just left. "What? How?" As the rockets burnt the denizens inside to a crisp, @peepso_user_7(Blaylock Samson) barely heard @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) running by shouting, "Always pack a signal disrupter, dickhead!" @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) continued on without breaking a step, the package remaining in tow.
15:00:14: @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) was running at break-neck speed and rounded a blind corner, stumbling upon a laser trip mine placed by @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson). Luckily, @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) vaulted over it, only severing one foot. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) resumes delivery with package in tow, albeit slightly hobbling.
16:00:05: @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) does not normally mourn death. @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) is accustomed to the loss of those they meet, in one capacity or another. But that last death. A split second of @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) thinking about it meant they were a split second too late on the trigger as @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) emerged from the parking garage, package in tow. The shot missed. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) dove, taking a shot mid-air. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) was not thinking about human connection, unlike @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson). This is arguably why @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) was shot in the gut. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) resumes their delivery, package in tow.
16:28:35: @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) misses their double-fisted pistol shots. A sad attempt involving a total of 24 rounds fired at @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis). @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) resumes delivery of their package.
16:28:44: The delivery point only has one way in, about a hundred yards away from a gated entry. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) has taken the precaution of wrapping that entire entry-way with barbed wire. The only issue with barbed wire in this day and age is that once spotted, it can be avoided. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) ignites their rocket boots, attempting to vault over the death trap. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) almost makes it, but is caught on their ankles, immediately becoming a tangled bloody mess in @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s trap. Frantic, @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) activates their shield generator which creates a kinetic field of energy around their body, and it successfully severs most of the barbed wire. Limping, @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) hustles towards the remainder of the delivery path, lobbing grenades over their shoulder. As @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) manically runs after @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) firing rounds in their direction, they are caught in one of @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis)'s grenades, losing a leg. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) continues, hobbling, towards the delivery point.
16:28:56: @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) steadily took aim from a second story window as @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) ran by below. Sweat dotting their forehead, @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) inhaled sharply and squeezed the trigger. It was a miss. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) resumes delivery, trying to ignore the echoing rifle shot and fragments of wall exploding just overhead.
16:29:00: @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) does not normally mourn death. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) is accustomed to the loss of those they meet, in one capacity or another. But that last death. A split second of @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) thinking about it meant they were a split second too late on the trigger as @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) emerged from the parking garage, package in tow. The shot missed. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) dove, taking a shot mid-air. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) was not thinking about human connection, unlike @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt). This is arguably why @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) was shot in the gut. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) resumes their delivery, package in tow.
16:29:08: @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) is impaled on a lengthy spear with a laser tip by @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) after a failed package theft attempt. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) resumes on their way.
16:29:13: There are automatic rifles and there are these. The GZNKA tank killer is surprisingly light as @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) hefts it on their shoulder. The rounds are known to puncture holes two feet wide through heavy ship armor, and are held in a backpack and fed via sling. It is this reason alone that @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) has used it, targeting @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis)'s ship as it races across the horizon. However, @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis)'s ship is not only retrofitted with two meter thick armor, but also an electronic shielding system. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s rounds do find their way through the shields, but only make it one foot into the armor. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) dips their ship, skirting past @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) and giving them third degree thruster burns across half of their body.
16:29:16: @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) has managed to somehow evade theft of the package thus far. @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) is feeling good. DAMN good. Unfortunately that feeling is momentarily suspended as a shot rings out, severing a cable holding up a net full of 700 pounds of refuse with a sign that has "Eat My Fuck - Cheers, @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)" scrawled on it in pink paint. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) picks up the package which lies next to the mangled limbs of @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis). Fuck eaten. Good job, @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt). "Parcel Transferred." You have the package. Now get that sucker to the finish line.
16:36:41: @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) is bloody from head to toe after a rough number of successful entanglements. "Geronimo, fuckstick!" They look up at the voice and see a a dot in the sky. It quickly turns into two dots: a sky born @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) on a rocket powered hang-glider, and the portable thermonuclear device they've dropped. "Parcel transferred," can be heard from dispatch as @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) swoops past the mangled corpse and snags the package.
16:41:33: @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) does not normally mourn death. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) is accustomed to the loss of those they meet, in one capacity or another. But that last death. A split second of @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) thinking about it meant they were a split second too late on the trigger as @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) emerged from the parking garage, package in tow. The shot missed. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) dove, taking a shot mid-air. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) was not thinking about human connection, unlike @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt). This is arguably why @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) was shot in the gut. @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) resumes their delivery, package in tow.
16:41:42: @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) takes two shotgun blasts directly to the spine from @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt), who continues on their way with the package. "Parcel transferred." @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) will be paying a deductible to get this fixed.
17:01:35: @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson) stumbles into their own trap: a hole dug in the ground full of Ixyotik Death Wasps meant to ensure @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt)'s destruction. Instead @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) resumes on their way, @peepso_user_9(Mac Nielson)'s agonizing screams ringing in their ears.
17:05:54: As @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) rounds a corner, they are distracted for more than a split second by a hastily posted cardboard cut-out of a Zyxxan Hound fornicating with a famous human politician from centuries before. This momentarily lapse in focus is all @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) needs in order to slam a large whirring chainsaw into the chest of @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt). "Parcel transferred."
17:06:59: @peepso_user_2(Leroy Palestine) is bloody from head to toe after a rough number of successful entanglements. "Geronimo, fuckstick!" They look up at the voice and see a a dot in the sky. It quickly turns into two dots: a sky born @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) on a rocket powered hang-glider, and the portable thermonuclear device they've dropped. "Parcel transferred," can be heard from dispatch as @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) swoops past the mangled corpse and snags the package.
18:01:20: @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) was running at break-neck speed and rounded a blind corner, stumbling upon a laser trip mine placed by @peepso_user_8(Ignoracious Buttafucco). Luckily, @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) vaulted over it, only severing one foot. @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) resumes delivery with package in tow, albeit slightly hobbling.
18:04:43: @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) misses their double-fisted pistol shots. A sad attempt involving a total of 24 rounds fired at @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt). @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) resumes delivery of their package.
18:04:47: @peepso_user_25(Calto Fremis) bludgeons @peepso_user_85(Corvus Wyatt) unconscious with a large metal crowbar, laughing and dancing over their bloody mangled body. "Parcel transferred."
18:04:54: Package delivered by Calto Fremis for $420,000